My Diabolikal Summer
by Aqua142
Summary: After the hectic Summer of Gravity falls, Dipper and Mabel have been sent to Japan to stay with their cousin Yui Komori. Although, there is more than meets the eye with the people she lives with and their summer with new mysteries to uncover
1. The arrival

_Red like roses, red like blood is on a VERY LONG HOLD! Since:_

 _a) There has been no news of season 3 DL_

 _b) RWBY volume 4 is still going_

 _So here we are! The FIRST time I did a fanfic with a cartoon and it's the one we all LOVE_

 _Gravity falls!_

 _So...this will be set between more blood and Dark fate. I might need a couple of ideas to spawn some chapters on it. At least this will keep me entertained._

 _Gravity falls belongs to Alex Hirch_

 _Diabolik lovers belongs to rejet_

Dipper and Mabel dragged their luggage out of the taxi driver as the man pulled up to a mansion. It was already nightfall and the rain was pelting hard, Dipper shrugged off his jacket and covered it over his head to shield the rain. Mabel was forced to slip off her sweater and follow his example.

"Damnit! I hate the rain!" Dipper cursed, he ran to the door and began knocking on the door with such vigour. After a few knocks, the door swung open with a rickety sound. Mabel and Dipper stared at each other with fear as there was no one behind the door.

"UGH! I thought we were done with the supernatural!" Mabel whined, she threw her arms in the air with annoyance. Her brother punched her playfully.

"C'mon Mabel! Uncle Seiji must've installed some automatic thing!" The younger twin smirked, it was unusual for him to show all the optimism but hey, sometimes it's good for a change. With that both of the teens stepped into the house. It had been two years since weirdmageddon occurred but nothing really changed between the twins. Dipper still had his birthmark concealed under his bangs and luckily he wore his signature pinetree hat. Mabel wore her shooting star sweater, her long brown hair was tucked neatly behind a magenta headband. When both twins rushed inside the house, they took some time to regain their breath before staring at each other. With that the twins started laughing.

"Ha ha ha! Man! That was one crazy flight! That turbulence was HELL!" Dipper laughed, Mabel kept laughing. With that they dumped both of their bags at the hallway. The pines teens couldn't help but gawk at the interior of the house. The extravagant chandelier that illuminated the dark room. The beautiful staircase with the velvet carpet. Both of them completely ditched their bags and walked closer and closer to the foot of the stairs.

"Man, even Pacifica wasn't this filthy rich!" Dipper gasped, Mabel stared at her brother.

"Filthy rich! Filthy rich!" They chanted, they kept pumping fists in the air. Unfortunately for them, they managed to attract unwanted attention of two mysterious men. After hearing laughter echo from the top, Dipper and Mabel looked up. Leaning on the banister was a boy around the age of seventeen. His fiery red locks were kept neatly under his black hat that was adorn with a pink ribbon. He had an amused smirk at both of the twins.

He said something that was most likely Japanese, since the twins couldn't understand him. They turned to each other in confusion, Mabel smiled and pushed Dipper behind her, reassuring her brother that she could handle it.

"Kutabare!" She called, the teen fell off the banister on his face. Another voice laughed, but it wasn't from the Pines twins or the teen. Another guy walked in, he seemed to have the same shade of hair as the guy who fell off the banister, Dipper and Mabel assumed they were brothers.

Mabel was about to scream 'kutabare' when Dipper slipped on his earpiece and mini-microphone. Since the pines twins weren't fluent in Japanese, Ford managed to invent a bunch of translating devices in order to assist them to communicate with any japanese individual.

"You little brat...oh you're in for it..." The one in the hat growled, he began cracking his knuckles.

"He-hey! S-stop! Don't hurt us, we're staying here for the summer?!" The boy replied, he nudged his sister into activating her device. Already both boys were pissed at the twins, the one in the hat especially. The teen with the hat slapped Mabel's head.

"You have some nerve to say, fuck you to me, DON'T you brat!" He growled. Dipper stepped forwards and in front of Mabel.

"Hey! Our cousin taught us that!" He defended, Mabel quickly slipped on her japanese speaking device.

"What does Kutabare mean?" She asked, the older boys stared at each other before looking at her.

"What's wrong with your cousin?" The one wearing the hat asked, turning to Mabel, he effectively dodged the question.

"I dunno, she must've played a prank on us. Bear in mind we only saw her since we were 10." Dipper muttered, he really missed Yui. That's when both boys' faces lit up.

"He he, do you think they're looking for their...SEXY cousin, Laito?" The one without the hat commented, already he was daydreaming about how this girl would look.

"Nfu, I can't wait to punish this little bitch-chan, don't you Ayato-kun," Laito agreed, he then turned to the twins. "But first, let's kick these little brats out of the house FIRST!"

Dipper and Mabel looked at each other with fear and then back at the boys, the pines managed to notice their protruding fangs.

"D-dipper!" Mabel gasped, the brother looked at his sister with fear. Even there was only one thing that he could do. He recalled Ford's journal stating how if you kill a vampire you confess your own love, sure it was stupid but there was NO way that was happening.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Both twins cried, they began waving their arms, screaming like maniacs and ran up the stairs, knocking Laito and Ayato on the ground. After the twins' evasive maneuver worked, Ayato and Laito growled.

"Those little brats..." Ayato growled cracking his knuckles. Laito got up and dusted his jeans.

"C'mon Ayato-kun, let's teach them a lesson they won't forget!"

 _I'LLRETURNDON'TBEREADYI'LLBEBACKDON'TBEREADYI'LLRETURNDON'TBEREADYI'LLBEBACKDON'TBEREADY_

After their time in Gravity falls, the pines really perfected on the art of screaming and running for their lives.

"WHY DOES THIS HAVE TO KEEP HAPPENING TO US!" Mabel whined, her face was beet-red with tiredness. She saw her brother, his stamina wasn't so well.

"Mabel! I think they've stopped chasing us." He whimpered, with that they leaned against the walls. Dipper opened up his journal and flicked through the pages. Before he left Gravity falls, Stan photocopied the pages of the journals prior to their burning. The scam-artist was generous enough to give the boy the entries and now the genius had copied it into a mini-notebook.

"Damnit! There's nothing in here?!" He cursed, he looked left and right. He wanted to make sure those guys weren't chasing them.

"Mabel, keep a look out, we need to make ketchup and hat-guy don't come from behind." The younger twin ordered.

"What are you doing outside my room." A voice droned in Dipper and Mabel's left and right ear respectively. They jolted backwards in fear, revealing himself from the door was a boy of seventeen years of age. He had thick black glasses that sat on the bridge of his nose, his light purple hair was in a style that seemed to resemble Eren Jaeger's. He had a beige sweater jacket and wore a black shirt underneath it, an un-clipped red bow tie hung loosely against the collar. The boy kept fidgeting with the weird teddy that he held dearly in his hands..

"H-hey, man. I'm...Dipper, this is Mabel. We just need a place to stay for now." The pine tree boy introduced. The boy-lolita looked at Mabel and Dipper before nodding his head and gesturing both to take refuge in his room. Instantly, Mabel made herself home on his bed.

"man! You've got such a bouncy bed!" She commented, jumping up a bit. Dipper quickly pulled his sister off the stranger's bed and apologized for her behaviour.

"I'm Kanato. This is teddy. What are brats like you doing here?" Kanato snapped, he glared deeply into Dipper's eyes.

"We're here to stay with our cousin, two guys earlier attacked us." Mabel explained, Kanato flickered his eyes to the shooting star.

"I wasn't talking to YOU, I was talking to him! Don't talk when you're not spoken to PREY!" He growled, he made his move to slap Mabel but Dipper caught his hand.

"Hey HEY! Leave my sister alone, we were planning to leave since the last two didn't bother to help us!" The younger pines explained.

"Nfu~ Well...would you look at that, they ran into Kanato's room." A voice musically commented.

"T' think that you kids would go in that hysteric's room, really cracks me up." Ayato added, he came from behind and had Mabel in choke-hold. Kanato growled and turned to Dipper, he gave the younger boy a look of betrayal.

"SO! You JUST came here to laugh at me?!" He accused, Dipper stepped back and had his arms up in the air.

"Kanato! Just! HEY! Don't attack my sister!" Dipper grasped the nearest weapon towards him, it was a hammer. He swung it in front in order to scare Laito and Kanato away, before making a break to Mabel. The older twin nodded and frisked something from underneath her sweater.

"GRAPPLING HOOK!"

With that she shot the projectile at Kanato's door, causing the mahogany wood to shatter into splinters.

"Mabel...you could've just opened the door." Dipper sighed. Mabel pulled him out of Kanato's room and spied a serving trolley. She replaced all the objects on the ground before climbing on the trolley and dragging her brother on. With both twins ready on the trolley she pushed the food cart forwards and it began wheeling itself down the hallway. The triplets stuck their heads out of the boy lolita's room to see both twins screaming

 **ONWARD AOISHIMA!**

"Who do you wanna bet is the next to run into these crazy kids?" Ayato asked, looking at his two brothers.

"Shu." They replied with synchronicity.

 _I'mwatchingyouI'mwatchingyouI'mwatchingyouI'mwatcingyou_

Dipper kept flickering through the pages of his journal as their little trolley kept rolling down the hallway. He looked to his left to see...no one beside him, Dipper looked in fear to see his sister behind and waving at him. He was about to curse when the serving trolley crashed into someone, making Dipper fling into a new figure. Dipper's vision shifted but soon honed into a guy around the age of nineteen. His bored blue eyes seemed to state at Dipper with annoyance, his blonde hair seemed to between Kanato's and Ayato's hairstyle. It wasn't too messy nor too neat. The thing that got Dipper's attention was how the guy was wearing headphones.

"Ah, sorry man." He got off the man and offered a hand to help him up. The guy took Dipper's head and hefted up.

"What are you doing here? You two brats are nothing with a nuisance." He studied Mabel and Dipper. Both twins looked at each other with nervousness, was he going to chase them like the others did.

"You're...not going to hurt us...are you?" Dipper asked, with wariness. The guy sat with his back against the wall and produced a violin.

"Tch, you're little kids. I'm not going to waste my time...but I might as well humour you brats." He growled; he patted both sides of him, gesturing them to sit next to him. The siblings looked at each other before nodding. Mabel sat on the guy's left and Dipper on his right. The violinist counted a few beats before going into the music. After 10 bars of non-stop music Mabel decided to break the ice.

"I...I'm Mabel...He's Dipper. You're a cool guy since you haven't started chasing us." She interrupted, Dipper punched Mabel's shoulder to tell her to shut up. The guy wavered a bit as he missed a note; he fixated a glare to Mabel before simply saying one word.

"Shu."

Mabel and Dipper snickered a bit.

"Shu? more like shoe." Dipper chortled, Mabel joined in, even cried a bit at the hilarity. Shu rolled his eyes and continued playing his concerto, the vampire kept his eyes on his instrument at all times. His piece was going pretty sweet until Mabel stood up, she accidentally tangled one of his headphones and ripped off the cord. This caused the abrupt ending. Shu glared at the shooting star.

"Um..sorry?" She tried, Shu placed his violin on the ground and grasped Mabel's wrist. She pulled weakly against his crazy strength.

"You little brat, this'll teach you not to ruin my..."

*CRASH*

Dipper held Shu's broken violin in both of his hands, the boy had utilized the apparatus as a hammer to knock the pure-blood unconscious, unfortunately it made him even more pissed. He glared at Dipper and punched the fifteen year old's face.

"Bro-bro!" The girl cried, Dipper gasped in pain as Shu threw another punch at his face.

"Don't take me for different, I'm like my brothers. You humans are nothing but prey for us...instead of seeing your cousin...you'll see the man on the other-"

With that Mabel kicked between Shu's legs and grabbed her brother's arm. They took off running for what seemed like the millionth time, leaving the oldest sakamaki holding between his legs. Behind the crouching vampire, the three triplets appeared.

"Ha? Shu? Whatcha doin'? Holdin' your crotch like that." Ayato asked, he raised an eyebrow since it was rare for his brother to crouch.

"Could it be? Perhaps...did Shu-kun run into that boy and star-chan?" Laito assumed, he leaned closer to see his older brother's pained expression.

"Hmph, Teddy thinks that you look weird..." Kanato huffed.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP! I'm gonna kill those brats ONE WAY OR ANOTHER!" He threatened, the young cordelia triplets backed away since this was a rare experience. For once Shu actually wanted to lead a death raid.

* * *

*slam*

"Mabel! I swear these guys are crazy!" He panted, Dipper locked the door perfectly and plopped himself on what seemed to look like a giant wooden stool. Mabel joined him and leaned on her back. She looked at her brother with hope but it died.

"Do you think...Yui's dead?" She whispered, the brother looked at his sister with fear.

"Dead? What do you mean?! Don't panic Mabel! The guy probably dumped us at the wrong house." Dipper reassured, Mabel pulled something from her pocket, it was Yui's three-flower hairclip.

"Where'd you find this?" Dipper demanded, he stared at it with fear.

"I found it in that purple guy's room. She was here Bro-bro, she was here and she's probably dead! SHE'S DEAD and SHE'S GONE!" Mabel began punching her brother's elbow.

"Hey! HEY! cut it out Mabel! You could wake someone up!" He growled. Mabel looked away. The pine tree knew that tears were coming from Mabel's eyes. The shooting star saw how Dipper was going to break down. The twins hugged each other and let the tears stream down their faces and on to their shoulders.

"STUPID VAMPIRES!" Mabel cursed, she kicked the seat they were on.

"GOD? WHAT THE? AYATO GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM!" A voice cursed.

It didn't come from outside.

IT CAME FROM THE STOOL THEY WERE SITTING ON!

With a closer inspection, the twins distinguished that it was a coffin.

Dipper and Mabel quickly lied on it in attempts to prevent whatever came out of coffin to exit it.

"Dipper you didn't tell me there was a body in here!"

"Mabel you didn't tell there was a coffin in there?!"

The coffin beneath both of the twins began to tremor, they desperately clung onto the lid but it failed epically. The coffin lid flung open, forcing both twins to fall off. Dipper pulled his sister up and witness a horrible monster arise. His white pinkish hair reminded the twins of freshly fallen snow, he didn't wear a shirt but had a silver key hooked around his neck. His face had a combination of tiredness, anger and annoyance. He even had a bit of drool dribbling from the corner of his mouth.

"what...do...you think YOU'RE DOING BY WAKING ME UP?!" He growled, he stood up fully and revealed that...he wasn't wearing anything. Mabel and Dipper screamed and covered their eyes with fear. The guy looked down and screamed before covering himself.

"PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!" The twins screamed, still hiding their eyes from his current state.

"WHY ARE YOU IN MY ROOM," The guy replied with anger. Dipper and Mabel couldn't answer, "HEY KID I have a pair of jeans on my chair, mind tossing 'em to me?"

The younger twin looked to his left to see a pair of pants, he carefully walked over and picked it up before blindly tossing it into the guy's direction.

"Thanks," The guy slipped on his pants. "Ok, you can look now."

The pines slowly opened their eyes to see the guy, he looked...a bit more decent. Mabel pulled out a camera and snapped a photo.

"HEY! DELETE THAT?!" The guy ordered, he lunged for Mabel but the shooting star effortless dodged his tackle and shoved the photo into her scrap-book. She was about to comment about how it was a perfect scrapbook moment but her brother dragged them out of the crazy guy's room. The white-haired teen took deep breaths before sitting on his coffin with annoyance. He clicked his tongue in annoyance on how the two little brat bothered him in his sleep, sometimes he wanted to sleep naked, WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT?!

That's when four heads popped from the doorway.

"Oi, Subaru, what's with the screaming?" Shu asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Did you run into those crazy kids?" Ayato sighed.

"I wonder if Subaru-kun was sleeping naked, again." Kanato mumbled, rolling his lilac eyes.

"Nfu~ I never knew you slept naked, even I won't do that." Laito chuckled, Subaru hissed in annoyance pointed to his wardrobe. Shu sauntered to the area and tossed his youngest brother a shirt to wear.

"C'mon, we got some kids to kill." Subaru ordered, pushing his deadbeat brothers out of the way.

* * *

"You're such a clumsy little girl." Reiji snapped, Yui blushed in embarrassment as she slowly unbuttoned his shirt. Their normal etiquette lesson had turned into a nightmare when she accidentally tipped the entire teapot on Reiji, soaking the vampire in black tea. Of course with his quick healing abilities, the man recovered well from the burns but he still reeked of tea. Yui finished the final button before pulling off the blouse with carefulness. She hung the shirt just the way he liked it: around the back of his desk chair. The blonde silently made her way to her predator and avoided eye-contact with his crimson pupils.

"Komori-san, a servant should always have eye-contact with their master." He ordered, the man picked up his riding crop and commenced dragging the flat-side against the girl's neck. Yui stopped breathing, hopefully not pissing him off. Reiji stopped and cupped her chin.

"Those eyes...so helpless...hehehe...that really does make up for your uselessness," He commented, the gentleman grasped Yui's wrist and pulled her onto him. She squeaked in terror as she found herself sitting between Reiji's thighs and utterly useless. "Stick your neck out and please your mas-"

*SLAM*

Two children, a boy and a girl, barged into Reiji's room and locked the door. Since they looked similar, Reiji assumed they were siblings. The boy quickly grabbed two of his two favourite disciplining apparatuses which were closest to them: a whip and a flogger.

"Here." The boy offered, he gave his companion the whip. His sister began to hold the hilt of it with both hands whilst the boy clutched the string bits of the flogger as if he wanted to used the base as the weapon. Reiji sighed and momentarily got off his chair.

"You don't hold a whip like that, look you hold it with your right hand and you pull back before striking forwards as if you were pitching a ball." He explained, he assisted the girl with the grip of the whip. After that, he moved onto the boy and showed him the correct way to hold a flogger before handing it back to the lad. Unlike the girl, the boy was able to adapt quickly.

"Oh, thanks man." The boy smiled, he brushed his fringe in order to wipe off some sweat. That's when something caught Yui's attention. On the boy's forehead was no other...than the big dipper.

"MASON?!" Yui gasped, she got off the chair and pushed up Mason's fringe upwards to examine the mark better. She scratched her fingernail against his forehead.

"OW! Yo-yo! Yeah it's me," Mason growled, he managed to push her finger away. "And call me **Dipper**! N-no one calls me that anymore." Yui smirked with malice.

"I might as well call you dip-shit" She began to give him a noogie. Mabel dropped the whip and hugged her cousin.

"I missed you ." The braces girl whispered, hugging her cousin tight. Yui noticed that she was crying.

"Shh..shh...I'm alive. I'm ok...I'm.."

"How do we know you're not a fake?!" Mabel demanded, something in her tone suggested that they've been deceived before. Yui observed the room and made her way to Reiji's table. She placed the tea-set on the table cloth and watched the expressions of her spectators.

Dipper and Mabel were grinning from ear to ear and chanting 'do it!' repeatedly, raising their fists up and down.

Reiji growled.

"Don't you dare, Yui Komori."

"OLE!" She chanted, with that she pulled the table cloth in an upwards angle, in which the tablecloth was pulled off effortlessly and the teaset only moved a smige. Not a single drop of tea had spilled.

"Kutabare bitches!" She greeted to her astound audience.

"Yo-yo, why did you teach us how to say 'fuck you' in japanese?" Dipper asked, cocking his head sideways. Yui blinked in confusion.

"Dipper, Kutabare means drop dead, not fuck you." She corrected, that's when the second eldest sakamaki cleared his throat.

"Kutabare can be defined as 'fuck you' or 'drop dead'. Drop dead is the more common and polite translation whilst fuck you usually derives from the uncouth behaviour of simpletons like my brothers."

On that note, the door kicked open. Standing in the doorway was Subaru with his foot mid-air since he was the culprit who kicked down the door. Kanato and Laito were on his left whilst Shu and Ayato were on his right.

"You little brats, you better have a damn good reason why you broke into our house." All five sakamaki brothers growled, Reiji huffed in annoyance and turned to the twins.

"We're staying here for the summer, Uncle Seiji said something about letting us stay here." Mabel stated, that's when an envelop dropped on Reiji's desk, the table-ware otaku took the envelop and opened it, his pupils scanned the letter.

"Hmph...they're telling the truth. **That man** requires them to stay with us for the next three months. He states that they're the bride's cousins and we're not allowed to partake of the twin's blood no matter what. He also said not to kill them." The man ordered, all the brothers cursed. With that Reiji pushed up his glasses. Yui smiled.

"W-well that's ok, I'm fine with my cousins staying with me. Ok so uh...this is Shu-san, Reiji-san, Ayato-kun, Laito-kun, Kanato-kun and finally Subaru-kun."

She pointed at each brother who glared at the twins.

"Hey...I'm Dipper...this is my sister, Mabel." The pine tree gestured towards the girl with the camera.

"Say cheese," She smiled, with that she snapped the photo. All the brothers winced in the flash, once the photo was produce, Mabel crammed it into the scrapbook. "Scrapbook moment..."

All the brothers sighed, this was going to be a LONG summer for them.

 _And that's chapter 1 done. ONWARD! AOISHIMA! SO yeah, my first chapter on a gravity falls X Diabolik lovers fanfic. If you haven't checked out my other fanfic (Red like roses, red like blood) Here's a summary of it._

After unleashing the powers of the silver eyes, Ruby is sent to Tokyo where she meets Yui Komori and a gang of hot vampires. With unexplained questions, Ruby must withstand the sadistic boys whom she must live with.

 _Yes, I loved writing RLR, RLB. I really want to continue writing it but...I can't since DL has no season 3...although I might do one for the vandead carnival arc for this one._

 ** _Fav/ follow and definitely review! I love getting them because it encourages me_**


	2. the talent of a chichinashi

_So apparantly yui's a badass... is she? Who knows? She's going to prove herself...as a distant relative of the pines twins! Not only that but will the sakamaki brother slaughter them with equal hatred for Cordelia and Beatrix? Let's get this party started._

 _Gravity falls belongs to Alex Hirsch_

 _Diabolik lovers is Rejet's property._

 _Go!_

Mabel and Dipper looked awkwardly at the brothers since they had successfully pissed off them all off in a record time of 30 minutes.

"So...uh..." Dipper bluntly stated, that's when Ayato scoffed.

"Hmph, these kids are a waste of time! Let's just kill them!" He growled.

"Wow, he has like...no social skills." Mabel pointed out, Yui laughed a bit.

"Yeah, ketchup's worse than me when it comes to talking." Dipper added, Ayato hissed in annoyance.

"Ketchup?! Call me Ayato-sama, you little worms!" He threatened, he picked up Dipper by the collar and was about to throw him out of the window when...

*thwip*

Yui tossed one of Reiji's playing cards in Ayato's direction, pinning the boy to the wall.

"Wow! I had no idea bitch-chan could do that!" Laito applauded, Yui sighed and helped her cousin up.

"One thing, please don't call Mabel, bitch-chan. Laito-kun, she's only 15." She begged, Laito smirked before patting the older pine's head, who was conveniently standing next to him.

"That's ok, Mabel-chan will be PERFECTLY fine. I'm not that low in standards." He claimed, giving the little girl a noogie. Kanato scoffed.

"Since when did you have high standards." He asked, eyeing his brother with curiosity. Mabel pushed out of Laito's affectionate G rated actions before helping her brother up. Ayato snarled with annoyance as Yui wedged the card out of the vampire's shirt.

"Sorry Ayato-kun...hm...I think i need to work on the angle a bit...the card didn't go in as far as I wanted to." She mumbled, all the sakamakis eyes widen.

"What do you mean, g-'go in as far as I wanted to'?!" Subaru sputtered, Dipper quickly stole Mabel's scrapbook.

"Oh here it is, Yo-yo was the best when it came to cool tricks. That's why she's the best cousin." He explained, he managed to find a picture of the three of them circa 10 years ago. There was a picture that had five year old Dipper and Mabel Pines gawking with awe at the seven year old Yui who showed the photographer an apple with a card wedged in it. All the brothers crowded around the scrapbook that the pine tree held. Reiji inspected closer, he never knew Yui had such potential...the potential to be an uncouth gangster.

"Hah? She's still a chichinashi!" Ayato smirked, poking Yui's flat breasts.

"H-hey?! Ayato-kun!" She gasped, she looked away with embarrassment, since the nickname was highly inappropriate for children around the age of 15.

"Hey ketchup, what's a chichinashi?" The shooting star asked turning towards the ginger.

"Chichinashi is pancake." Subaru blurted, he REALLY didn't want to be on the receiving end of Yui's cards. The twins examined the tsundere's red face before shrugging, Dipper turned the page and it revealed a picture of Yui a year older than the previous photo who looked as if she had pulled the white tablecloth that used to be underneath a flaming candle-holder. Shuu raised an eyebrow.

"You seem to have a lot of talents." He admitted, turning to the modest human.

"Oh..it's...just a gift I developed." She mildly stated, Kanato scoffed.

"This is obviously fake, Yui-san can DEFINITELY not do that." He commented, Mabel snatched the scrapbook from dipper and crammed it into the sleeves of her sweater.

"Oh yeah! Then what do you guys think of Yo-yo?" She defended, Dipper and Mabel looked deep into each of the sakamaki brother's eyes.

"A flat-chest." Ayato began, he poked at Yui's weak bust.

"A little bitch." Laito commented, picking up her luscious locks and sniffing it.

"My toy." Kanato explained, the boy grinned at Yui, making the blonde cower in fear a little.

"A pain." Subaru huffed.

"A lady needed for discipline." Reiji snarled.

Shu turned his head with annoyance, hinting that she was nothing but a piece of filth to him. Yui looked away with defeat, the pines looked at each other.

"We...we can PROVE that she's cool!" Both said with indignant, Reiji and Shuu looked at each other before smirking.

"I doubt you would convince us...but the triplets and Subaru are pretty easily tricked." The glasses-wearing adult claimed, Shu nodded his head. That's when Dipper and Mabel hi-fived.

"Which trick first?" Yui asked, tilting her head with mirth.

"Uh...Apple and card!" Dipper cheered, with that Yui lead the twins to the kitchen, the brothers sighed.

When the humans arrived to the kitchen, they were shocked by how quickly the brothers arrived their.

"H-how...did you get here so quickly?" Dipper asked, studying the brothers. Ayato scoffed.

"What do you think? We teleported here, brat! Now here's an apple, throw a card in it already so we can..."

*twip*

A card had lopped off the side of the apple, the piece of fruit dropped on the kitchen floor. That's when Mabel rushed to the side and gave her cousin an empty plastic bottle.

"Flip the bottle! Flip the bottle! Flip the bottle! Flip the bottle!" The twins chanted, Yui held the piece of plastic with the neck and took a deep breath. She threw the object above her head and it effortlessly landed on the top of the table.

"EEEEEEEEEEEH?!" All the brothers gasped, Subaru picked the bottle up.

"Hmph...I'm sure there's no trick to this!" He commented, he tossed the bottle in the air but instead of landing on the base, it landed on it's side, thus creating an ungraceful thud in the kitchen. The triplets bursted out in hilarity.

"Where to next?" Reiji sighed, pushing up his glasses. Surely she couldn't be THIS talented.

I'vegotmyeyeonyouI'vegotmyeyeonyouI'vegotmyeyeonyouBecarefulbecauseiwillreturnreturnreturnreturn

When they went to the game room, Yui effortlessly pinned Laito's hat against the wall with a dart.

When they went to the dining hall, Yui managed to pull off the tablecloth despite all the tableware and plates on it. Shu and Subaru were quick enough to drag Ayato away before the guy was able to strangle one of the twins from calling him ketchup again. Yui looked at the clock as the brothers tried to hold him down.

"Mabel, Mas-...I mean Dipper. I think it's time you guys got to bed...Reiji-san...please show them to their rooms." The glasses adult sighed and pushed his glasses up.

"Very well, Dipper..Mabel...follow me to your rooms. I assume your luggage has been attended-"

"-what does that mean?" Mabel interrupted, she leaned closer to her brother so the man couldn't hear what she was asking.

"I think he means that they've been taken care of."

"Your room will be...close to Shu's since I have matters that I need to discuss with Yui." Reiji continued, he nodded his head to Subaru and Ayato who grasped both Mabel and Dipper's wrists.

"Hey! Let us go, ketchup!" Mabel whined pushing against his grip.

"Shuddap! And stop calling me that." The ginger growled, it didn't take both vampires very long to drag both humans into their designated room.

"Wait" Dipper gasped, with that Subaru slammed the door shut. Both twins desperately knocked the door.

"Let us out, butt-faces!" Mabel insulted, she kicked the door. After a few petty hits, none as avail.

"Ah! Ah!" Yui's voice moaned, the twin's looked at each other with fear.

"Mabel, we need a way out. We need to help Yo-yo!" The younger twins ordered, Mabel nodded and rustled in her bag before pulling something out. It was her confetti cannon.

"Duck bro-bro!" She ordered, with that, she pulled the trigger and the door bursted open.

"How did you sneak that past customs?"

"It's a gift!"

Dipper noticed two minigolf clubs nearby and picked one up.

"Here, close range weapons, we need them." He explained, with that both twins went back to back and began slowly pacing towards the sound of Yui's screams. It was in 10 minutes when the shooting star nudged the pine tree and pointed to the phone nearby. They nodded their heads and Mabel stood guard, the boy made his way to the phone and dialed a familiar number.

"S'up dis is the mystery shack." A voice chirruped from the other side of the line.

"Soos!" The twins gasped, thank god! He still worked at the mystery shack, if they were lucky enough, maybe they could find Grunkle Stan and Ford.

"Oh hey, whattup dawg?" The question-mark casually inquired.

"Soos, is grunkle Ford here? This is urgent!" The cap-wearing boy prompt, maybe Ford could explain everything about these crazy vampires and how they hold their cousin hostage.

"Huh, oh Mr Pines. It's Dipper. Yeah, dood says it's urgent." He explained, then scuffling came from Soos' side.

"Kids?" Two annoyed yet old masculine voices growled.

"GRUNKLE STAN, GRUNKLE FORD!" The twins cheered, Mabel immediately ditched her post and ran to the phone.

"Grunkle Ford! The guys that Yui live with...th-their vampires!"

"Amazing! Karl-heinz' sons am I correct? How have they matured?" the inquisitive six-fingered man smirked. The twins blanked out a bit, Karl-heinz? Who's Karl-heinz they thought with curiosity.

"Wait, you KNOW the sakamakis?" Dipper interrogated, no WAY could a man like him deal with a man who sired 6 evil sons.

"Yup, I met their father a couple of years ago. He asked me to assist him with this plan he came up with. Oh, I wonder if Reiji's continued on his resurrection drug maybe-" That's when shuffling was heard, the grumbling sound of a familiar relative.

"Now's not the time to be impressed point-dexter. Kids, we need you to st-btz...btz...damnit! the line's breaking up! the line's..."

That's when the phone was silent for a bit. That's when the phone picked up again.

"Grunkle Stan, is that you?" Mabel nervously asked.

"guess who?~~~" A melodic voice came from the line. Both children gasped as they saw Laito and Subaru menacingly glaring at them.

"Hmph, stop saying stuff like that. It makes you sound like a pedophile." Subaru scoffed.

"isn't...he a pedophile?" Dipper asked, looking at Laito with wariness.

"Nah, he's just an incest." the albino replied.

"In...sect?" Mabel tried. Subaru sighed again.

"IT MEANS HE LOVED HIS MOM IN A WAY YOU'D LOVE A GIRLFRIEND!" He blurted out. After a few minutes of processing that thought, the twins reeled in disgust.

"EEEEWWWWWW! That's disgusting!" They gasped. Laito was about to make a snarky comment when Dipper swung his golf club, it narrowly missed Laito's face but it knocked off the fedora.

"Run and scream, Mabel!" Dipper ordered, that's when Subaru scoffed.

"No idiot, you scream and THEN you run." He corrected, Mabel cocked her head in confusion.

"But that's what you do when you fangirl." Mabel stated, looking confused at Laito.

"It depends on what you're fangirling over..." He admitted. With both distracted, Dipper swung his golf club upwards and nailed Subaru in the crotch. Mabel on the other hand, blew attack glitter in Laito's face before taking off.

"RUN! RUN! RUN!" They screamed at the same time, at that moment, they ran into Kanato and Ayato. Both vampires looked as if they wanted to brutally slaughter the twins.

"Stay back!" the twins ordered, standing back to back. Very soon, Subaru and Laito recovered their composure and encircled the twins.

"Heh...Beaten up by a bunch of kids, hilarious Laito." Ayato smirked.

"Says the guy who's nickname is ketchup." Kanato grumbled, Ayato was about to strangle his brother when a voice came from the back.

"PLEASE STOP IT!" Yui screamed, she pushed past Ayato and hugged her cousins, Dipper and Mabel took this opportunity to surround their cousin.

"We'll protect you." Dipper reassured, Yui sighed with annoyance yet relief before kneeling towards her cousins' height.

"Look...I've...learnt my place here. Sure if you don't accept it, I'm happy for you guys to leave. I don't want to be a burden for anyone, if God wishes to punish me: then let him do that to me. I wish for both of you to NOT get involved with this. Got it?"

The twins looked nervously, Subaru sighed with annoyance.

"C'mon brats...let's...get you to bed. Oi, Ketchup-sama. Help me with them." The tsundere ordered, his older brother rolled his eyes before picking Dipper up like a sack of flour. Subaru picked Mabel up by the ankle before tossing her in the air and catching her bridal style.

"NO! NO! YO-YO!" Mabel screamed, Shu nodded his head before Yui obediently pulled her collar and showed it to Reiji. The glasses-wearing teen licked his lips in hunger before going in for the kill.

"NO!" Dipper screamed before the vampires threw both of them in their rooms, before locking the door behind them. The twins backed up from the fearsome purebloods and kept their stance.

"Stay away from Yui!" Dipper vowed, he and Mabel glared deeply into the eyes of the two older teens, Subaru and Ayato scoffed before sneering down at them.

"Oh yeah? What's going to make us obey you?" Ayato demanded, he picked the cap-wearing twin by the neck and lifted him in the air.

"Dipper! Let him go, butt-face!" Mabel screamed, kicking his shin. Her offensive technique had barely had any impact on the vampire they nicknamed "Ketchup". The takoyaki-loving triplet snarled at the shooting star before back-handing her. She screamed as she flew across the room and knocked her head painfully against the book-case.

"Ugh!...M-mabel!" The pine tree weakly groaned, Ayato grinned sadistically before tossing the noodle-armed child into his sister's direction.

"Deal with 'em. I wanna a sample of chichinashi's blood." He ordered, Subaru dutifully nodded and watched Ayato slowly swagger out of the room. Once the close was clear he helped both twins up. The pines struggled as much as they could since he was one of THEM.

"Stay away from us! Don't go near us!" They growled, wriggling around.

"Hey! Cut it out! Listen, both of you. Unlike those shit-heads. I'm rational." the youngest sakamaki ordered. The twins looked warily at each other.

"How...can we trust you?" The male sibling ventured, glaring deeply into the vampires eyes. Mabel pushed her brother.

"Dipper...maybe we should." She whispered, her brother gave her a look of shock.

"Mabel! TRUST NO ONE! That's what Grunkle Ford wrote!" The pine tree recounted, Subaru clicked his tongue with annoyance.

"Hmph, I bet that you don't trust so many people that you don't even have any friends." The guy insulted, Dipper's mouth dropped in response to that sick burn.

"Oh snap! Up top!" Mabel cheered, Subaru accepted the girl's hi-five.

"Look unless Yui gives her permission, I won't touch her blood. We good?" Subaru grinned; Dipper turned to his sister, who nodded her head in a knowing way, before shaking Subaru's hand.

"Ok...we're cool." Dipper smiled, that's when the window blew open. The youngest sakamaki cursed.

"Damnit, it's windy as...hey...there's a journal on here," He noticed, he picked up the book before flicking through it's pages, before stopping at one and reading the text. "Triangulum, entangulum. Meteforis dominus ventium-Wait...is that..."

Dipper gasped and snatched the journal from him.

"...no...fricking way! We defeated him! He's gone!" Dipper growled, he showed Mabel the page that the vampire was reading out of. The female twin gasped in fear. The older teen raised an eyebrow due to their overreaction.

"What? It's just.."

"Subaru please, we need to discuss this...PRIVATELY!" They replied with synchronized timing. The pureblood sighed before unlocking the door.

"Just...don't stay up to late...we have school tomorrow."

With that he slammed the door, Dipper flicked through the journal that Subaru found on the windowsill. The leather was still clean and smooth, it smelled like black tea and ink. Dipper quickly flipped from the forbidden page before looking into the content.

"Eve? Persephone? Huh? What's Le Etolies?" He mumbled, already one day and the boy discovered another journal. That's when Mabel cleared her throat, the boy turned around to see the countenance of his nervous sister.

"Dipper...Grunkle Ford's journal is what turned us against each other, last time. If we're solving this mystery...we're doing THIS together!" She pridefully stated, Dipper stared at the journal before nodding in his sister.

"You're right Mabel. A new summer, a new adventure." He replied, the boy crammed the journal in his pillowcase. That's when the door knocked, Mabel groggily blinked her eyes before hopping off her bed, she opened to see...Yui.

"YUI!" The american twins cheered, they hugged their cousin with gusto.

"Guys...I need to confess something," She sighed, the blonde looked as if she was going to burst into tears or as if she had been lying to them, "I'm...not..Uncle Seiji's daughter. I'm adopted...I'm not really your cousin...let alone Yo-yo." The helpless teen dipped her head with disgrace, she felt as if she failed both of her relatives. Dipper and Mabel looked at each other before hugging her.

"I'm never letting you go again." Dipper whispered, hugging against her thin stick-like structure. Mabel joined her brother in this warm gesture. Yui took this opportunity to stroke their heads.

"You wanna know a secret? We still love you. You love us more than any cousin that we ever had. Whether they're blood or just friends, you'll ALWAYS be our Yo-yo." Mabel admitted, Yui hugged her cousin before getting off her bed.

"I need to go, I promised all the sakamaki brothers that I'd let them suck my blood as long as they don't hurt you guys. I'm done with Reiji, Shu and Laito, I'll try to be alive tomorrow " The teen explained.

We move back onto everyone's tsun-tsun racecar, Subaru Sakamaki. The only thing that kept Subaru up all night was that weird thing he found on the sill of the twin's room. He didn't recognize the handwriting...but...he recognized the figure in the notebook.

* * *

The young Subaru stared hopefully towards the tall tower that shielded his mother from the outside world. The hysteric that he addressed as Christa sakamaki kept peering down at him before resuming to her normal hiding place (which was in the corner of her room). To make matters worse, Karl-heinz summoned not only Cordelia and her triplets but also Beatrix and her two sons. Great, as if three annoying triplets weren't enough, let's add the two stuck-up ones. The only good thing that came was that Ayato, Reiji and Shu were studying so it was only Kanato and Laito who would bother him, the boy sighed with annoyance before stumbling in the garden.

"Stupid roses, stupid Karl-Heinz...stupid..."

"Wow, whatcha doin' there kid?" A cheery voice greeted, the white-haired boy gasped and turned around to see a strange entity. A triangle with one eye, legs, arms and a top-hat. He cocked his head in confusion.

"Who...are you?" He demanded, pulling out his knife in defense. The thing laughed heartily before crossing his arms.

"Relax kid, I ain't no threat...well unless you're my enemy. Name's Bill Cipher, I'll take that you're some kind of cute puppy!" The triangle chuckled. The young pureblood growled with annoyance.

"Shut up you! My name's Subaru Sakamaki! 6th son of..."

"Huh, who're talking to Subaru?" A voice asked, the boy whipped around to see his two older brothers Laito and Kanato joining him. Subaru clicked his tongue.

"What do you guys want?" He ordered, cracking his knuckles, Laito tilted his head in confusion but still hugged his half-brother brother.

"Aww, come on Subaru. We're brothers after all! It's good for us to band together in the face of evil, right Kanato?" The ginger prompt, his purple-haired sibling nodded his head in agreement. The lolita looked warily at the floating triangle.

"Subaru, did you summon a demon? Teddy and I are very disappointed that you didn't invite us." The boy whined, Subaru huffed in annoyance.

"No I didn't Kanato, this...guy appeared before me. Ugh, he's so blinding!" The boy cursed, he shielded his eyes. Bill let out a hearty laughter (again) before patting Laito on his head.

"Hey kid, I think I've got the perfect gift for you," Cipher chimed, with that he conjured a black fedora with red ribbon on it, "Here, a hat for you kid!"

The triangle plopped the hat on the little boy, it obviously was too big for him but one day Laito would grow into his new accessory.

"Oh come on! That's not fair! Why does Laito get to have a present!" Kanato whined, he stamped his foot several times before Subaru flicked his older brother's forehead to shut him up. That's when Kanato tackled Christa's child and the little beatdown between the brats took place. Bill snapped his fingers and blue flames surround both boys, they gasped with fear as the demon effortlessly separated them with levitation. The triangle sighed with annoyance, rubbing his eye with two fingers.

"Look kid, how about this. I'll play with you guys for say...until sundown and it'll make up for the present I gave fedora here." The thing laughed, Kanato puffed his cheeks.

"Help me catch my bats. The ones I caught flew away because Laito couldn't protect them when mother told me to sing for her." With that, the teddy-bear carrying boy glared at his fedora-wearing brother.

Bill snapped his fingers and instantly one-eyed bat appeared and flew around the garden. The boys gaped with awe at the magnificent aspects of Bill's creatures.

"Well kids," the triangle demon generated three nets for the brothers before handing them each one, "these mono-bats ain't gonna catch themselves."

With that the three youngest sakamakis spent their afternoon attempting to capture the bats whilst the demon watched with interest.

* * *

Subaru paused before climbing in to his coffin.

No way, he thought with stubbornness. No way, Bill couldn't be evil. He trusted Bill...He turned around in his coffin before someone tapped on his lid, with that he reluctantly opened it and discovered it was Yui. The girl was covered in several bites, her eyes flickered with pain and tiredness.

"S-subaru-kun, it's your turn. Pick your..."

"I don't want your stupid blood...as tempting as it looks." He admitted, Komori tilted her head with confusion.

"But...why?" She asked, obviously these guys enjoyed partaking her blood, he scoffed with annoyance.

"I..made a promise to your cousins that...I wouldn't touch you...unless you gave permission to." He explained, Yui blushed before hugging Subaru.

"Thank you Subaru-kun...I'm...tired." With that she flopped onto the guy's well-muscled and soon commenced sleeping. The tsundere blushed in this incredibly embarrassing position.

Yui was on top of him, her clothes were ripped up and she was smeared with bites and her own blood. Subaru was...just there.

"Ugh...they're gonna kill me in the morning!" He cursed, before drifting into a slumber.

 _Lol, why think so mature Subaru? You can just say 'she fell unconscious so I thought she would be safer with me' not only that but OMG Bill Cipher?! He's dead right? Maybe? La torre? Il Matto? Gli amanti. I wonder what this plan will be? What are they? Let's wait until next chapter! please_

 ** _FAV/ FOLLOW AND PLEASE REVIEW!_**


	3. first day, first experience

_I call a three-way! Or maybe even a four-way! Stand...bow...lock on! Stand...bow...lock on! Oh yeah! Sensei target on_

 _I fricking LOVE assassination classroom but now every time I watch an episode I cry. But yeah. I was originally planning to do a crossover with Diabolik where Nagisa taught Yui etc...but...this is way better! Let's go. Sorry if that i didn't update in a long time. I'll try to be more consistent and dedicated when writing my stories._

 _I'm sorry if all the guys are OOC but I had to because I needed the Pines to have their little moments together!_

Subaru groaned with annoyance and rubbed his mouth, after a few moments he rose up his coffin and discovered ink on the back of his hand. He released a scream before rushing to the mirror. He discovered someone had written.

"Cute puppy-2017." on his face. Not only that but someone had encircled around his eyes with grey marker as if were to accentuate his ruby eyes.

"LAITO! AYATO! KANATO! GET YOUR ASSES HERE BEFORE I FUCKING PULVERIZE YOUR HEADS INTO THE GODDAMN WALL!" He cried on the top of his lungs.

"Calm down Subaru-kun, you're not the only one who was targeted." Kanato grumbled, the youngest sakamaki took time to inhale his brother's current...facial issues.

Laito had green marker smeared on his face, as well as a fu-man-chu beard, he also had spectacles and the writing of へンタイ on the centre of his forehead.

Kanato had doodles on his face too but instead of emerald, the shade of the marker was indigo. As well as a well-drawn mario moustache, little sparkles were on the edge of them. In english the words 'pretty little psycho' were on the centre of his forehead.

Like his blood brothers, Ayato also fell victim of the mysterious artist. A french moustache was done artistically well, two rosy cheeks on each side of his face. Finally the words of チチナシ were written well on his forehead.

"What's this racket!" A voice called, Reiji stormed in without his glasses.

"what happened to your glasses?" Kanato asked in an unimpressed tone, Reiji showed his brothers of his possession, with the lens caked with stickers. Reiji closed his eyes for a bit and sighed with annoyance, at that moment, it revealed two well-drawn chibi eyes on his eye-lids, making him look a bit comical.

"I wonder what happened to Shuu." Laito mumbled, attempting to rub off the katakana off his forehead. Speak of the devil (or vampire), Shu stumbled in the room and had a pained expression on his face.

"Someone sparkled my face...ugh it hurts every time I blink." He groaned, his younger brother snickered at the scene since it was unusual for their brother to be covered with gems and sequins.

"Alright, let's get the twins..." He sighed, the brother nodded in agreement before hearing laughter coming from the hallway. The brothers stuck their heads out to see Mabel, Dipper and Yui laughing at their little exploit.

"I had nothing to do with this." Yui reassured, smiling from ear to ear. She had Mabel's markers in her left hand.

Dipper and Mabel held the stickers and the glitter gun respectively and continued admiring the photos of the sleeping vampires before glueing them into Mabel's scrapbook. At that moment, someone had slammed their hands on the shoulder's of the twins.

"So...it was you three who did this to us..." Reiji glowered, his eyes glinted with evilness. The twins gulped with fear. Yui gasped and turned to run but ran into Laito's arms.

"Ne ne~~ Bitch-chan, why don't we punish you for...doing this to us..." Laito flirted, he moved her hair and leaned closer to sink his fangs into her pale skin.

"W-wait! We have school l-later right? So it's better to be punctual to school? R-right?" Dipper bluffed, hopefully the vampires were too stupid to pick it up.

"Hmph, I don't mind being late for school." Shu muttered, he grasped around Dipper's throat as if he were choking him.

"Shu, cut it out!" Subaru ordered, he tried to protect the twins when his purple-haired brother mocked him of his 'soft attitude', forcing the tsundere to back down.

"I'll bedazzle your face even more!" Mabel threatened, Shu formed a fist and knocked it hard against her head, Yui lit up.

"R-reiji-san! I...believe that as a gentlemen, it is discourteous to be tardy when it comes to significant events. I believe school is essential to all." The blonde bluffed.

Mabel tilted her head to Dipper for a translation of the formal language.

"It's rude to be late to important stuff e.g. school." The pine tree explained, the shooting star widened her eyes in reliasation and nodded her head in order to agree with Yui's bluff. Reiji huffed with annoyance.

"Laito, let the girl go. Mabel and Dipper your uniform is in your room. I advise you change into your attire quickly." He ordered, shooting daggers to their directions.

"Roger!" Dipper saluted towards Reiji's direction.

"You got it!" Mabel nodded before grabbing Dipper's arm and speeding towards their room. The adult sighed with annoyance.

"That goes for the rest of you, although they're annoying, that MAN has some use for them...for now we won't touch them. Understood?"

"Just as long as they don't touch my music."

"Hmph, the one with braces is a flat-chest."

"They're annoying, aren't they teddy?"

"Whatever~"

"..." Subaru turned his head away. He was tempted to tell Reiji about what he found but...with his sociopathic behaviour, that was a definite no.

 _FoolMagicianHighPriestessEmpressEmperorHierophantLoversChariotStrengthHermitWheelofFortuneJusticeHangedManDeathTemperanceDevilTowerStarMoonSunJudgementWorld_

Due to the rush, Reiji ended up getting his familiars to buy takoyaki for breakfast. All but Ayato were disappointed, Laito begged Reiji if he could partake of 'bitch-chan's sweet nectar' but Subaru just kneed him several times in the stomach to shut him up. Thankfully for the twins, they were close to each other and their cousin. Dipper poked the little balls with the toothpicks.

"What...is this?" He grumbled, he managed to pin one of them with the toothpick and picked it up, he examined the stabbed octopus ball.

"Hah? It's takoyaki? Haven't you Americans heard of it?" Ayato snarled, raising an eyebrow. Mabel eyed it carefully before spearing one of the balls and placing it in her mouth. After a few minutes of chewing she winced in disgust.

"Eww! mayonnaise!" She stuck her tongue out to reveal the white gooey substance. Dipper groaned before putting one in his mouth...Surely it wasn't.. THAT bad. He thought.

To answer his question he gagged a bit as if he were going to throw up.

"Dipper! Don't be rude, Reiji-san did his best to prepare breakfast for us." The blonde scolded, pulling down on the boy's hat. Dipper mumbled before using his toothpick to wipe off all the mayonnaise on it.

"What's wrong with mayonnaise?" Ayato growled. Laito chuckled.

"Maybe because it looks like-"

"Don't finish your sentence pervert!"

"Shut up all of you, Teddy finds you annoying!"

"I can't believe I'm related to these idiots.

"Took the words right outta my mouth, now shut up so I can enjoy my music!"

Mabel and Dipper sighed before turning to Yui.

"Does this always happen?" They muttered unimpressed, Yui solemnly nodded her head.

"Wow, and I thought we bickered a lot, don't we LITTLE brother!" Mabel joked, Dipper growled before flicking his sister's long hair over her face. The shooting star waved her hands blindly attempting to see through her hands.

"Pft! Pft! Pft!" She sputtered through her thick hair, Dipper began laughing until he fell off his seat and dropped something from his jacket. Subaru's eyes widen as he recognised the leather cover. The pine tree gasped before shoving the book back in the inner pocket of his blazer, he slumped back into his chair to pretend that it never happened. Kanato looked at the takoyaki on his lap before opening the door to the limo, instantly letting a gust of wind enter the limo. Dipper's cap flew off and his bangs revealed his embarrassing birthmark. It took two minutes of squabbling before Laito slammed the window shut.

"Wait...is that...Hokuto shichi sei?" Shu mumbled, he pointed at the birthmark. Dipper looked away with embarrassment and covered it up with his hat.

"What's hokuto shichi sei?" Mabel asked, turning to Yui.

"It's what Japanese people call big dipper." She explained, at that moment, the car pulled up to the school. Dipper was about to slip his hat on before Reiji snatched the accessory from the pine tree's grip.

"Oh I don't think so, hats aren't a part of our uniform. That goes for you too, Mabel. Sweater off. NOW!" He snapped, Dipper sighed and brushed his fringe up to conceal his mark. Mabel slipped off her aqua sweater and left it on the chair before climbing out of the limo.

"Subaru, I expect you to guide Dipper and Mabel to their classes." The youngest sakamaki raised an eyebrow.

"hah? Why me?!" He groaned, as much as he found the twins hilarious, he still found them annoying.

"Because, since Mabel and Dipper are around 15, they should be around your age when it comes to classes." Shu grumbled, with that all the sakamakis climbed out

"Thanks Subaru." Mabel chirped hopping out.

"Yeah, thanks man." Dipper continued, shuffling his feet a bit. Subaru blushed.

"W-whatever...let's get this over and DONE WITH!" He snarled, with that he picked both twins by their collars and carried them to their classroom.

When they arrived, Subaru threw both the twins on the ground before taking his place in the back of the room.

"Ah! It's Subaru-kun!" One of the girls from the back squealed, instantly the tsundere was flocked by his fangirls.

"ugh," he groaned, the youngest plopped his head on his desk, "I HATE going to class."

Mabel and Dipper cracked up a bit before a new figure graced into the classroom.

"Class 1E? I assume?" A masculine (yet feminine voice) inquired. A male teacher with aqua pigtails swaggered into the classroom.

"WOW! It's a tranny!" Mabel inappropriately gasped. Dipper slapped his sister's head.

"Mabel, don't be rude!" Dipper growled. The teacher laughed a bit.

"It's ok, I get that a lot. So you must be the new students, Mason and Mabel Pines?" He asked.

"Actually...call me...Dipper. No one calls me that anymore."

"THAT SOUNDS LIKE AN OLD GRANDPA'S NAME!" Someone in the back shouted, the teacher shot a glare at the kid to shut up.

"I'm Shiota Nagisa, I'll be your teacher for the rest of the year." He announced to the 1E students. One of the girls raised a hand and inquired of what happened to their last teacher.

"Oh...he was required to...leave. Moving on, we have two new students from America. Please...sit in the front..." The aqua-haired teacher smiled, Mabel and Dipper looked nervously at each other, maybe their teacher hated them. The twins carefully took their place in the front of the row, almost immediately Nagisa began to write on the blackboard.

 _You are incredible in bed_

A coupled of the kids in the back snickered.

"You are incredible in bed, repeat!" Shiota-sensei ordered, Mabel and Dipper looked around with embarrassment as their fellow students repeated what the teacher directed his attention to the front.

"You...are incredible in bed." Dipper sighed, Mabel followed his example. The cyan-eyed teacher paced to the front.

"I apologise if my teaching methods were slightly extreme but I assure you that it worked well for me." He reassured the siblings. Mabel looked to Dipper and nodded her head.

This guy didn't seem so bad...maybe we could trust him. Her face seemed to convey. Dipper sighed and nodded.

"Ok sir." he politely replied, tipping his head a bit, Shiota-sensei cringed a bit.

"Please refrain from calling me that, it makes me sound like an old man." He joked.

After the entertaining lesson with Shiota-sensei, Dipper and Mabel decided to go bother one of the sakamakis and beg for money. Before they left the room, one of the delinquents in the front row stuck his foot out.

"AUGH!" Dipper groaned, he fell flat on his face, revealing his embarrassing birthmark.

"HA! No freaking way! It's the big dipper!" The kid who tripped him jeered, his fellow pea-brains laughed.

"yeah, shows how much of a big dip-shit he is!" He replied, Mabel helped her twin brother up before standing infront of him.

"You leave my bro-bro alone!" She ordered, pointing an accusing finger at the male classmate. He looked down at her.

"Oh yeah! Give me a reason why!" The punk spat in the shooting star's face before holding her up by the collar.

"Mabel!" Dipper cried, one of the punks stepped on his back. Subaru flicked his head to see the twins suffering and attempted to make his way to rescue them when.

"SUUUUUUUUUUBARU-KUN! You're so cute when you blush!" One of the girls gushed, she commenced tugging on his crimson cheeks.

"A-aaah! S-stop it! Baka!" he whined, blushing intensely, increasing the number of fangirls that swarmed him.

"AAAAAAAAAAH! Subaru-chan! Kawaii!" The girls exclaimed with synchronicity. Mabel gasped as one of the punks held her up by the throat.

"S-stop!" She whined. At that moment a loud clap noise echoed through the room. The punk who was strangling Mabel dropped to the ground unconscious. Shiota-sensei had a face that would make death curl up in a ball and start crying.

"I'll be in the staff-room if anyone needs me." The teacher calmly explained, Dipper and Mabel slowly took in the oxygen after staring at their strange teacher who exited with swag.

"...Let's...go steal some money." Mabel managed, her brother nodded her head. Although the school was a new environment, it didn't take the twins very long to find one of the brothers.

"MM~~ Ah~~Laito-kun, not at school!" A feminine voice came from the supply closet.

"Ah~~ Bitch-chan, I can't get enough of your sweet aroma!" Laito's lewd voice returned. The siblings stared at each other with confusion before knocking on the door.

"Crap, Laito-kun, someone's at the door."

"Shit, ok. Stay quiet I'll handle this." Laito's hush voice silenced the girl, he opened the door to see the confused twins.

"Uh...we're not interrupting anything are we?" Dipper nervously asked, Laito slapped his face in annoyance, the brunette girl that he had pushed against the wall had her blazer off and her blouse undone. Of course they were interrupting something, probably something that they shouldn't see.

"Whatever, what do you want?" He sighed, rubbing his disheveled hair, he totally ignored the girl.

"Is your...shirt half-buttoned up?" Mabel pointed out, Laito groaned before he was about to slam the door.

"W-wait! We were wondering if you had any money we could borrow! Reiji didn't give us any cash so uh..."

Laito sighed before frisking in his pocket.

"Sorry kid, no cash. Kanato's on the first floor if you need him." He sighed, closing the door.

"Ah~~ Laito-kun how dare those brats interrupt our time." The voice moaned.

...

Laito reopened the door. "On second thoughts do you want me to come with you guys, that bitch turned me off." He muttered, buttoning up his shirt.

"What do you mean, 'turned you off'?" Dipper interrogated, handing Laito his infamous fedora.

"...I'll tell you when you're older." He muttered, slipping on the hat.

Before they encountered any of the sakamaki brothers, the twins and Laito ran into a certain teacher.

"Ah, Sakamaki Laito-san, was it?" Shiota-sensei greeted cheerfully. Laito clicked his tongue with annoyance.

"What do you want, old man." He ordered, looking down at the short teacher.

"Oh...nothing. It's just that my students must be back by five minutes before lesson begins...y'know. Just so I know that they're safe." He grinned innocently, with that he linked arms with the twins and slowly dragged them away. Laito gave a funny look at the teacher before casually shrugging his arms and returning to his normal classroom. As Shiota-sensei watched the pervert return, he turned to his two students.

"Here Yakisoba bread, don't go near him got it? Even if you live with him, don't get too attached. He's known for kidnapping children." Shiota-sensei explained, Dipper and Mabel cracked up.

Laito? Kidnapping children? It made the twins laugh a bit. As Subaru would say "he's a womanizer not a a pedophile." As they neared their classroom, they heard some punching sounds coming from the classroom. The twins looked curiously at each other whilst their teacher furrowed his brows. It didn't faze him that there was already a fight that erupted in the classroom.

"Listen here you little punks, touch those twins again...and you'll find your head smashed through that wall and nothing will be left with it except for a pile of blood and a strange blob that looks like a chewed up gum." Subaru ordered, Nagisa clapped his hands to silenece his disgruntled class, unlike his previous ones, this didn't paralyse any of the students.

"Alright Subaru-kun, I think they got the message, everyone back to your seats now."

 _ISHALLRETURNNRUTERLLAHSI_ _ISHALLRETURNNRUTERLLAHSI_ _ISHALLRETURNNRUTERLLAHSI_ _ISHALLRETURNNRUTERLLAHSI_

"You should really give us money, man." Dipper took another bite of his Yakisoba bread. Mabel followed his example. Instead of eating it during class, they decided to partake their lunch in the limo...which really ticked off Reiji.

"You brats, stop eating inside the car. You'll make a mess!" The second son had finally lost his patience and attempted to tackle Dipper. Luckily for him, the boy's quick movements allowed him to slip off his seat belt and climb over his sister before commencing to crawl over all his fellow-limo riders. Dipper didn't care that the other vampires were pissed. He cared that Reiji was going to skin him alive.

"Get back here you little brat." Reiji stood up properly and began chasing the fifteen year old around the limo's walking space.

"Run Dipper!" Yui cheered, she already was proud of her cousin adopting the 'GTFO for your life tactic' she taught him a long time ago.

"Don't get caught by table-ware otaku and I'll make sure that you get my pudding." Ayato cheered.

"Dipper! Dipper!" Mabel cheered, she began to raise her fists up and down as she cheered on her twin brother.

The merry chase ended abruptly when the driver skidded to a halt, forcing Reiji to faceplant on the floor and Dipper to fly through the window and smash his body on it.

"Yes and Dipper prevails!" Yui smiled, she assisted her cousin from his position whilst Mabel helped Reiji up. The megane quickly shot a glare at Dipper before opening the door, the pines were the first to fly out of the door. They couldn't wait until they could jump on their beds and sleep it off although it was Reiji who plucked both of them up.

"Ah! Ah! hey no! Let us go!" Dipper and Mabel began struggling before Reiji teleported them to his room and dropped them carelessly on the ground. He already had a teapot with freshly brewed tea.

"Well children, I'm interested in your summer in Gravity falls." He demanded he sliding the tea towards the twins, Mabel carefully dipped her finger in before licking it.

"It's safe," with that they commenced partaking of Reiji's tea.

"Tell me how is your Uncle Stanford doing?" The megane child inquired, grinning to himself.

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!

Reiji didn't look unimpressed that Mabel had ruined his priceless carpet with his tea.

"YOU KNOW GRUNKLE FORD?!" The pines exclaimed with disbelief, Reiji pushed up his glasses. He definitely knew the old genius.

* * *

 **Flashback**

"Reiji stop bothering me, I wish to discuss something with this man." Karl-heinz sighed. For the fifith time, Reiji had pestered his father about his latest exploit when it came to memorising this book. The young vampire at the physical age of 17 glanced demonically at the king of vampires and at the newcomer with 6 fingers. After a brief glare, he nodded his head politely before making his way in his room. Not far away was Beatrix praising his idiot brother Shu who managed to master the violin perfectly.

Big deal, he thought bitterly. For a deadbeat, he sure evolved after Reiji had incinerated a mortal village as well as this 'Edgar' that Shu was fond of. Reiji sat with disinterest in the pavilion with a book he found in the library that his mother enjoyed.

 _Wuthering heights by Emily Bronte._

He obviously understood the plot well but seemed to mock the protagonist's idiocy in general.

"Hmph, stupid humans." He muttered to himself.

"Whatcha readin' there kiddo?" A friendly voice came from above, where the teen noticed it was the 6 fingered visitor. He gave a sour look.

"What do you want, Mr Pines?" He hissed, his tone was soft but dangerous. Stanford chuckled a bit before ruffling Reiji's head.

"Please call me Ford. I'm only trying to strike a friendly conversation." He smiled, Reiji pushed up his glasses before looking away.

"W-wuthering Heights, sir." Reiji attempted to make a good impression since he was so tempted to badly burn the visitor with his sharp tongue.

"Huh, looks like you're not enjoying very much. Are ya kid? Here, it's book I liked when I was your age."

Ford handed the boy a pitch black book with a devil on it.

"Doctor Faustus by Thomas Mann." Reiji recited, looking at Ford with careful eyes.

"Keep it, you'll love it."

* * *

"OH! So that's how you know our uncle..." Dipper smiled, sipping the tea with care. Reiji nodded his head.

"Yes, I still have his possession. I will return it to him someday..." he looked wistfully out the window. Unfortunately that's when the wind began blowing.

"Have you heard of someone called Bill Cipher?" He asked, this time it was Dipper who spat his tea.

"N-no! Definitely not!" The pine tree bluffed, how did Reiji know about that demonic triangle? First Subaru and now him? What next Ayato?

"We need to go...Dipper bathroom break!" With that excuse, the twins barreled out of the tableware otaku's room, leaving him thoroughly pissed.

"I'll discipline them someday...but in the mean time...I can use him to exact revenge."

Reiji pulled out a page with archaic writing and especially...the zodiac.

 _ANNNNNNNNND I'm done! So yeah! Here we go! Assassination Classroom AND Gravity Falls AND Diabolik lovers! I'm on a roll! YES! Also, I did my research and Yes, Ford would've been back to see when Reiji was a teen. Also, why does Reiji have an incantation of Bill cipher? Why is Nagisa here? Does Ayato also know who bill cipher is?_

 _But if you have any request chapters! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! Send them in!_

 _Once I run out of ideas then...I will definitely accept ideas! I'll give you credit for an idea AND I'll make it linked to the plot (OMG thank you Aqua)_

 _OK so until next time_

 _FAV/FOLLOW/ REVIEW AND PLEASE SEND IN YOUR REQUEST CHAPTERS I'll be overjoyed to see that people both appreciate my work AND want to help me write this story_


	4. Waddles?

_ANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNND I'm back, whatsup peeps? Near the end of this year I might not update as much but hopefully people still like this story. With the sakamakis knowing Bill Cipher and Ford personally, it makes our favourite twins suspicious. Even with Nagisa Shiota's mission from Karma Akabane, why is everyone's girly-looking assassin here in Japan? Teaching or for a darker cause?_

 _I own nothing except this idea_

 _Gravity falls-Alex Hirch_

 _Diabolik lovers- Rejet_

 _Assassination classroom-Yusei Matsui_

Dipper and Mabel wandered casually down the hallway. They attempted to ignore the fact that Reiji knew about Bill Cipher and their Grunkle Ford, as they passed the bathroom, they heard a girl squeal.

"Kya! L-laito-kun! G-get out!" A voice pleaded. Dipper instantly began knocking on the door.

"Yo-yo! Yo-yo! Is everything ok?!" He asked nervously, honestly, he had no idea that Laito would've been so low when it came to standards...seriously? Walking into a bathroom when a girl was naked? How obscene is he? Mabel joined Dipper.

"Fav-cuz! Yui? Get out of there!" Mabel gasped; the twins placed their ears against the door to hear minor shuffling and pushing. After a few squeals and laughs, Yui managed to force open a door with a towel expertly wrapped around her bathing suit.

"L-laito-kun! Please! Stop doing that!" She pleaded, Laito casually swagged out of the bathroom holding her clothes.

"Ah ah ah, what a naughty little bitch-chan. Walking out naked in front of her innocent cousins. You must be really-"

"Teddy, don't you think they're annoying..." Kanato interrupted, he already had a fork stuck in his mouth and his teddy bear didn't look impressed at Yui who was half-naked in a towel.

"H-hora! Kanato-kun! Stop it. I'll be downstairs in a bit. Dipper, Mabel follow Kanato-kun. I'll be there." She explained, Dipper and Mabel looked warily at the boy lolita who grinned maliciously.

"He's so creepy." Mabel whispered, Dipper coughed awkwardly.

"Come on Laito...you two...Reiji doesn't like it when people are late. That man isn't coming." He explained, Laito placed two comforting arms around the twins.

"Okay Kanato-chan~~ May-chan~~ Dip-kun~~ Why don't we go together to eat dinner KAY?!"

"He's a pedophile right?" Dipper reassured, looking at the teddy-obsessed vampire. All Kanato could do was shrug before leading the way, on the way Dipper and Mabel decided to constantly poke each other and make raspberry noises. It's a sibling thing was their excuse. As they approached to the large stairwell case, Dipper and Mabel took the initiative to climb on the handrail before carefully walking down.

"You brats! That's dangerous!" Laito warned, his perverted tone was present in his command.

"PBBBBBBBT! Look I'm an aeroplane," Mabel immaturely stated, that's when she slipped and fell face first on the floor. "...Ow!"

Dipper quickly jumped off the banister and knelt to his sister.

"Mabel, are you ok?!"

His sister unleashed a thumbs up to show her state, the girl lifted her head.

"Everything hurts." She whimpered. Dipper grinned with humour and hoisted his sister up. By that time, the twins noticed that not only Laito and Kanato had come joined them but Reiji was there as well.

And he was not happy

Not at all.

"Why are you late?" He demanded, looking down at the twins.

"We were goofing off!" Mabel replied, giving the tableware otaku a goofy grin. Reiji clicked his tongue before turning to Kanato.

"Where is the human?"

"Still in the bathroom. Apparently she'll make her way down soon." Kanato grumbled, he did the fake quote gestures. Reiji growled before pointing towards the hallway.

"The dining hall is there. Make your way to there...brats."

Mabel stuck her tongue out whilst Dipper huffed in annoyance before running down the hallway. Reiji did his best not to strangle the little brats, he turned to his brothers.

"You two, dining room now. I better not return with the entire dining room trashed."

Kanato and Laito nodded with obedience before disappearing. Reiji pushed up his glasses before making his way to the bathroom, he knocked on the door politely.

"Miss Komori, may I come in?" Not long after, Yui opened the door.

"Hai, Reiji-san." Her hair was still a wet mess, making the megane man click his tongue in annoyance.

"So in the 5-10 minutes in which you were informed of our monthly dinner party, you decide to take your time," he grasped Yui's wrist and pulled her into his chest.

"R-reiji-san!" She blushed and attempted to wriggle out of his grip.

"With your tardiness...I assume there must be a punishment." He continued. Before he could commence with the girl's repentance, smashing noises came from the dining room.

"DEATH TO THOSE WHO ENJOY BACON!" Dipper's voice chipped from the dining room.

"Oh! Tableware otaku's gonna kill ya now!"

"Anyone who disses Waddles is dead meat!" Mabel replied.

Reiji felt a vein of anger flow through his head.

"Seriously, your cousins are little pests." He muttered, pushing up his glasses with annoyance. A few minutes later, the sound of dishes smashing followed.

"That's it!" He grasped Yui's arm and dragged her into the dining room where there was an all out war between the triplets and the twins. Shu and Subaru obviously decided to watch this chaos stoically. Kanato held two pieces of bread in both of his hands and was hurling it at Mabel who was standing on a chair with two broken plates. Her brother held a bowl which used to hold mash potato. The pine tree decided to pour the sticky substance on both Ayato and Laito.

"Oh...um..hey Reiji?" He weakly greeted, Reiji didn't look all impressed at the mess at the dinner table.

"May I ask what happened here?"

That's when a snort came from underneath a table, making him raise his eyebrows. A pig's head stuck out from it before the whole body waddled towards Yui.

"Aww, how cute." Yui reached down and stroked the pig's head.

"Waddles! Hug Reiji!" Mabel ordered, Reiji turned quickly to the pig that tackled him and commenced licking his face.

"Repulsive! Get this swine off me!" He whined, eventually lifting Waddles in the air. The pig let out a satisfied grunt before Dipper took the pig from his hands.

"Good pig." the boy smiled, he fed Waddles a corncob to reward their pet.

"Is this a gift from their parents?" Reiji asked, turning to Shu. His older brother shrugged before handing the megane adult a note.

 _Their parents insisted that they bring the pig to this house as it has caused a nuisance for them. Treat this pig with the utmost respect and do not kill it at any circumstance. Do not worry about taking the pig to school, there will be a familiar who will tend for it during this time._

Reiji growled before turning back to the joyful twins who were applauding their pig for successfully executing backflips.

"that is one talented pig." Subaru smiled, he rubbed the pig's head which gave a cute squeak and began rubbing its head in his abdomen.

"H-hey! cut it out! I'm ticklish!" he laughed a bit before the pig tackled him to the ground and walked all over him to get to Shu.

Unlike Subaru and Reiji, he wasn't so fazed by the pig and rubbed his head. Soon Waddles began snoring contently on Shu's body. Shu didn't care, he just wanted to sleep. Reiji growled in annoyance as he saw the pig comfortably snuggle around his brothers, sugarcoating each and one of them. Ayato seemed to find it 'cool' for a pig to live with them.

Laito and Kanato didn't mind. Subaru found something cute (again). Shu found a sleeping buddy and Yui enjoyed Waddle's innocent company.

"Great, now this makes it harder for me to dump the stupid pig." Reiji muttered, Dipper gave the older teen an apologetic smile.

"Sorry Glasses, don't worry you'll warm up to him. Everyone does."

Reiji sighed.

"I guess s-wait a minute what the HELL did you just call me?"

Reiji didn't approve a nicknames, the occasional 'Tableware otaku' from Ayato ticked him off severely and now the twins have come up with a ludicrous nickname for him?!

This made his blood boil. Reiji picked Dipper up by the collar. Triggering Mabel to call out his name but she was too paralyzed to interfere.

"Listen here and listen well. Right now, that MAN hasn't given us the opportunity to kill you yet, so you better count yourselves lucky. But once your vacation ends, we'll end your life here. Because we DEFINITELY can't have you blabbering about our lifestyles, can we?"

"B-but we've managed to not tell anyone about weirdmageddon for a year now!" Mabel blurted, a few moments of silence and then Dipper facepalmed.

"Really Mabel? You just broke our streak." Dipper groaned.

"Wait, weirdmageddon?" Ayato asked, raising an eyebrow. With the words 'weird' and 'armageddon' combined together, it raised a lot of questions. But not the one that Ayato was going to ask. The redhead made a grab towards the twin's scalp and said calmly to his brothers.

"I'm going to borrow them. Don't wait up."

"Ayato-kun wait!"

With that he disappeared with the twins, leaving his brothers, Yui and Waddles speechless.

"...I'll get the phone." Reiji sighed, once again his monthly dinner plans had been ruined again and now he was resulting to order pizza.

* * *

 **Flashback**

Ayato hid carefully in the bush. He didn't want to. He didn't want to go back into that room with that witch again. He managed to sneak out of the room with the assistance of Laito and Kanato, who for once actually cared for him. Now Laito had ditched him and a pissed Cordelia was attempting to find him.

"Ayato! You worthless piece of shit! Get your ass out here so you can study!"

He was the best, alright. But not the best at submitting to his bitch of a mom. Cordelia often cursed about how he inherited his father's sense of adventure and rebelliousness. Even if she always chucked him in the river, it never seemed to extinguish his flames of pride. The lady got bored and eventually wandered back to the mansion, which Ayato assumed she would spend the next few hours having her 'alone time' with uncle Richter. Ayato shuddered at the thought.

"That hag, she NEVER knows how to leave me alone!"

"Evening, kid. What brings the son of Karl-heinz to a place like here?" A cheery voice broke the silence and Ayato screamed. Floating before him was a triangle with a single eye. It's yellow skin seemed to flash and radiate like a god but his stick-like limbs and casual tophat was what contrasted this gracious presence before him.

"Augh! Who the hell are you?! You better answer ore-sama, or you're in world of pain!"

"Ore-sama, ore-sama. We're all sick of you calling yourself that!" A boyish voice came from the bushes. Ayato clicked his tongue.

"Damnit Subaru, I know you're there! Stop hiding and show yourself!"

Ayato's youngest halfbrother popped out of the bushes with a few leaves in his hair, usually he wouldn't turn up to Cordelia's estate but for some random reason, his side of the family was required to come. That's when two more figures appeared, Shu and Reiji. His older brothers and the sons of Beatrix.

"What do you want!" Ayato snarled, his rival for the family title and the tableware otaku sneered down at him.

"Don't get worked up, your brothers pleaded that we go meet this 'Bill Cipher' person." Reiji snorted, Ayato glared at his know-it-all brother.

"Reiji, calm down. Ayato's just confused. Like us." Shu chastised. Reiji scoffed, muttering about a human softening his heart.

"Nice one highheels-"

"-my name is Shu-"

"moving on, your dad has some special little plan coming up that apparently is better than my 'weirdmageddon' so I thought, why not tell you kids about it?! Like seriously? I could use the help someday and wipe that sick 'my-evil-plan-is-better-than-yours' grin off his face." Bill chortled.

Kanato tilted his head.

"Weirdmageddon? Is that a game? It sounds very dangerous." He asked, he held teddy close to him. Whilst Laito draped his arm of his brother's shoulder.

"Cool down Kanato, I'm sure it's just nothing." Laito jeered, giving his brother a little noogie.

"Baka, it's a combination of the words 'weird' and 'armageddon'!" Ayato snarled.

"He's right and if it's those words combined, it's something that isn't good." Shu deduced, nodding his head to Ayato. Reiji puffed his cheeks. Even with his intense studying how come someone like Ayato knew something like that without studying it.

"Hey where did you come across this!" Reiji growled, balling his fists. He tried to throw a punch at Ayato but missed by a big amount. Subaru quickly slipped behind, held his brother's arm in armlock, and forced him into the ground. The jaggered rocks cut his face. Bill grimaced at the blood gushing from Reiji's face.

"Hey hey! No violence. Here kid, a present from me." The demon chatised, snapping his fingers, a pocket watch flickered in the air and dropped into Reiji's outstreatched hands. Once Reiji opened it he read the curley text engraved on the watch.

 _"To Reiji Sakamaki,_

 _you're special in your own little way._

 _Bill Cipher"_ It read

Bill chuckled to himself, before generating nets and monobats for the little vampires to catch.

Maybe it was a bit too earlier to discuss weirdmageddon with them.

Worst case scenario: they would get in the way of his plans.

* * *

Ayato made his way to his room before throwing the twins on the ground.

"Where the hell did you hear that word!" Ayato snarled, Dipper rubbed his head and assisted his sister to stand up.

"W-we won't tell yo-"

"Some evil triangle guy took over the world with his weirdness and called it that." Mabel blurted.

"MABEL!" Dipper whined, Ayato flickered his eyes to the shooting star.

"Was it Bill? Bill Cipher?" Ayato hissed, Mabel gulped nervously.

"Why do you need to know?! Why are we telling you everything? What do you want with our cousin?" Dipper demanded, Ayato cursed under his breath.

Negotiation was never his forte.

"I...uh...uh...just answer the question!" Ayato demanded, he picked Dipper by the throat and lifted the boy in the air.

"Who else is a floating demonic triangle with one eye, a huge jerk and nearly killed me and my sister?" Dipper stuttered, with that Ayato threw him on the ground and kicked both twins out of the room.

Both of them rubbed their butts and winced.

"He's so annoying! I wonder what Yui sees in him!" Mabel whined. Two hands clamped on their shoulders.

"What are you two doing outside Ayato's room." A monotone voice whispered, the twins screamed and turned to see Shu cover his ears.

"Tch, you're so loud." He moaned, rubbing his ears.

"Shu! What the hell? Don't scare us like-...is that pizza?" Mabel sniffed the air carefully before her eyes lit up.

"PIZZA," With that she sped down the hallway and fell on her belly before crawling crazily towards the pizza box that the sakamakis, Yui and Waddles were eating, "I'M COMING!" She hissed and finally grabbed a slice and took in it's savoury taste. Reiji clicked his tongue with annoyance before pushing up his glasses.

"Is she ALWAYS like this?" Reiji growled, although his question was directed towards Dipper, the boy was already gone and munching on the pizza slice next to his sister.

"S'up bro!" He greeted, earning a hi-five and a praise from his sister.

"Nice impression of Soos there." Mabel commented. Waddles snorted in agreement and snuggled towards Yui's hand to demand chin rubs.

"Where's Ayato-kun?" Yui asked, rubbing the pig.

"Last time I remembered he kicked us out of his r-"

"Do I smell pizza here?" A voice ordered, standing on the top of the stairway case was ore-sama himself.

"Yeah?" Dipper answered.

"Where's my takoyaki?" He demanded. "There's no takoyaki." Shu muttered, pushing in his earphones.

"I want takoyaki."

"There's no takoyaki, now shut up and eat the pizza." Shu growled, with that he threw his shoe at Ayato, nailing the target.

"If you thought Reiji was the mom of this family, you're wrong. It's Shu." Laito grumbled.

A few minutes later, the twins were caught up telling an epic story

"And I got the leafblower and crammed that Gnomejerk in it before blasting that Giant gnome monster!"

Reiji rolled his eyes.

"And I'm supposed to believe this?" He commented unimpressed at this 'tall-tale'

"Oh no, we took a pic, see?" Dipper showed the scrapbook moment to Reiji. The second son took the scrapbook and studied it carefully.

In the photograph was of the twins aiming the leafblower at a gigantic monster made of what seemed to little bearded men.

"Huh...so they were telling the truth." Subaru muttered, as if on cue waddles yawned and plopped on his side, for a moment Reiji rejoiced but soon figured out that Waddles was actually sleeping.

"Damnit, so close," He sighed, Mabel threw him a dirty look, "But the pig is right. Off to bed all of you...I guess the pig can sleep in your room."

Reiji snapped his fingers and familiars began sweeping up the mess in both the dining hall and the hallway. Each brother got up and decided to make their way to their each room. Even Dipper and Mabel followed Reiji's command. Yui was going to but felt a cold hand on her shoulder.

"Ne ne~ Bitch-chan, let's have some fun. Some fun that only needs two pe-"

Shu quickly ushered the twins away before Laito could get any more 'perverted'.

"Don't stay up all night, hentai. You have school tomorrow." He sighed. Subaru and Kanato gagged at Laito's acts and quickly teleported to their rooms. Ayato stayed back just to yell at Laito whislt Reiji was required to observe his familiars when cleaning the mess.

Yui looked sighed with annoyance as she managed to shake off Laito's harsh grip and make her way quietly back to her room. As she paced down the abandoned hallway, she noticed a strip of paper close to the twin's room. She was about to give it back to the pinetree but noticed writing on it. The letters was cursive and clean (so it definitely wasn't Dipper's penmanship) so she commenced reading it out of curiosity.

 _As I continued on my research on the ultimate race, my partner Stanford Pines introduced me to this being of 'knowledge' also known as Bill Cipher. Intrigued I allowed my friend to summon this entity and soon learned of how much power he possessed and could inflict on your enemies. If you wish to summon him you must complete this ceremony. Even if Cipher is gone, all he needs is a vessel._

As Yui read this message she soon knew this 'Bill Cipher' could do. She instantly sped back to her room and copied down the enchantment.

"I could save them," she muttered, writing the chant on her pale arm, "I can save them from those monsters."

01234567891011121314151617181920211202918171615141312111019876543210

Nagisa Shiota sat calmly reading a book left to him by his late teacher. Tears slowly dropped as he found the class photo with his beloved tutor.

"Koro-sensei..." He whispered, brushing his fingers against the photograph. That's when his phone rang.

"Yeah, Shiota Nagisa here...Karma-kun!" The assassin rejoiced.

"Yo Nagisa, so how's the assignment for you? Hasn't been on too hard for you?"

"I feel a bit creepy spying on a couple of teenagers, Karma-kun but at least I get the benefit of teaching."

"Come on, who could I depend on when I need someone to infiltrate a school? Besides, with the Government needing to investigate the hostage held at the Sakamaki household AND the mysteries of Gravity falls, it's a kill two birds with one stone."

Nagisa faltered.

"I...guess..."

"If it gets tough then I'll send in back up. Just like old times." His friend reassured.

"Okay...I need to get some rest before this 'night-school' thing gets out of hand.

"Okaysureby,IalsosentKayanoandSuginotoyourhousesodon'tmessupyouroncechancetoconfessyourloveforherokayseeyaalsookuda, ,g'night!" Karma rushed the last bit and hung up, leaving Nagisa confused. With that the doorbell rang and he perked up.

"Huh, must be the pizza I ordered." He mused with that he ambled slowly towards the door and opened it.

"Yo Nagisa, how's teaching going?"

"Uh..hey Nagisa..It's been a while. Karma-kun said that you needed help for an assignment so here I am?"

Damn you Karma

 _aww how sweet, Reiji was given that death watch by Bill. Minus his bitch-attitude towards Shu, I actually feel sorry for him. He studies so much and yearns for his mum's attention but only gets a wave from her. Damn you Beatrix, AT LEAST CORDELIA ACTUALLY CARED FOR HER KIDS...in a bad way but she still treated them like they existed. Granted, I'd rather have Cordelia as a mum BUT not be the oldest. I'm musically talented so I would be like the Kanato child. Which of the Dia-mums would you like to be?_

 **FAV/ FOLLOW AND PLEASE REVIEW!**

 **I LOVE GETTING ENCOURAGEMENT**

 **AQUA OUT!**


	5. Oh no Mabel!

_Hi, so basically, i'm just uploading all the chapters i have written because in two weeks i won't be able to post for 10 weeks. So yeah, speed chapters for " **See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil"** and **"My Diabolik Summer"** Fav and review. _

_Let's go!_

Once again, it was normal morning for the sakamakis to get to school. Usually Reiji would down his cup of tea and commence his daily routine. But oh no. Today was different. For a prank, Ayato decided to hide Reiji's china in who knows where. So Reiji...wasn't his usual self. He was locked up in his room like a confined animal, even completely ripping his shirt out of frustration. He craved for Yui's blood more than ever.

"...Ayato this is all your fault." Subaru sighed. All the inhabitants of the sakamaki house crowded outside Reiji's room. Waddles the pig looked around and snorted, having no idea what was going on.

"Where's Mabel?" Yui asked, all the brother turned towards the older Pines who returned with a blender full of mysterious juice. She looked as if she was ready to splash it.

"Ok here's how it works. Fav-cuz here is the bait for Glasses. White rabbit and Mr hat will open the door and lump of potatos will fall on glasses to pin him down. Once Glasses is subdued, we'll all take turns on dumping Mabel juice on him. Bro-bro, Eren Jaeger and Ketchup, find his teaset. That's the plan. EVERYBODY GOT IT?!"

Everyone was blank at his plan, having no idea who was who. Waddles squeaked to signfy that he understood.

"Good let's go!" With that Dipper, Kanato and Ayato took off running to look for the teaset. Laito and Shu opened the door immediately and revealed their crazy sibling. Subaru punched Reiji knocking him unconscious before grabbing the Mabel juice from Mabel and dumping it on the victim's face.

Reiji sputtered.

"What the?! What substance is this! It smells like rotten tomatoes and overdue cordialis and...disgusting!"

Waddles oinked and started licking Reiji's face, partaking of the remaining Mabel juice. Reiji grimaced as Mabel picked up the pig and hugged it to her face.

"Good pig."

"Guys we found the tea set!" Dipper staggered with the heavy tray of tea. Reiji noticed that there was already a cup of tea for him, he carefully took the cup and examined it. The tea looked as if was an average cup of hot water with leaves in it (hopefully I got the reference right). After inhaling the scent, Reiji sipped before sighing.

"Who made this?" He demanded, looking at 2/3 of the triplets and Dipper. Ayato put up his hand.

"Don't lie to me Ayato, if it was you who made it, then you would've used toilet water instead of normal water."

Ayato lowered his hand.

Reiji shook his head, before giving all the residents the godly stink-eye.

"Well what are you waiting for? Get changed, we have school in a couple of minutes!"

* * *

Dipper and Mabel were casually strolling down the hallway when they heard squeals of women.

"Huh? Wonder what's happening?" Mabel mumbled when they got to the source of the sound, Dipper groaned.

The famous Japanese Idol, Kou Mukami, was being flocked by his usual throng of fangirls. Mabel gulped as she and the idol connected eyes, one of them turned red.

"Dipper we need to leave...now."

He couldn't agree more.

"THINK FAST!" A voice cheered, Dipper ducked quickly and a baseball collided with Kou's face.

"OW WHAT THE HELL!" Kou whined, he came into the direction of the twins. They hugged each other with fear as the idol stomped closer but pushed past them, confronting a man around their teacher's age.

This man seemed to be calm and posessed black hair in a spikey bowl-cut like fashion.

"Oh sorry about that, thanks though." The man took the ball from Kou and rubbed his head.

"Wait...you're that baseball player! Slimy Sugino!" One of the girls gasped, with that they transfixed their attention from the idol to the sportsmen. Kou took this opportunity to slink past the new celebraty and rush to his classroom, knocking Dipper in the process. Mabel reeled back to punch him but someone grabbed her fist.

"Mr Shiota!" Dipper gasped, a girl with long black hair assisted him up. Their blue-haired teacher gradually released Mabel's hand.

"Pft, Mr Shiota? Wow Nagisa, you've gotten a lot older...and shorter too." Slimy Sugino joked patting Mr Shiota's head.

"Wait Nagisa?" Mabel asked, the black haired girl giggled.

"Yup, Nagisa Shiota, that's your teacher. I'm Kayano Kaede, he's Sugino Tomohito."

"Eh? Sugino? You never told me you were coming!" Nagisa muttered, readjusting his hair. His friend gave him a goofy grin.

"I'd describe it as a pop-in for your assignment." The baseball slugger chipped in. That's when the bell rung. Once Nagisa brought his friends to the classroom, everyone was uproar. In attempts to calm it, he explained how he knew them, as well as "Wow, considering that our teacher's lame he seems to know a lot of people." One of the kids whispered.

"Yeah I know right? Well-renouned scientist Okuda Manami. Super serious government hotty Karma Akabane. Gaming extreme and part time social worker Kanzaki Yukiko!" His female friend gushed,

"Don't forget Slimy Sugino and famous actor Kayano Kaede." The kid before added again.

Nagisa felt a sweatdrop appear on his head.

Damn Karma, next thing he knew, the whole of Class 3-E could be turning up to his class just for what? A simple snooping of whether Karma's collegues' sons were harvesting a hostage? A simple facepalm wouldn't be enough to highlight the stupidity of calling more than three Class E students to investigate this shenanigan. Maybe it was Karma just being pissed at his superior, nevertheless Nagisa continued the lesson.

"Ok...you are incredible in bed."

Kayano and Sugino chuckled.

"H-hey! Bitch-sensei's teaching worked!" Nagisa accused but never the less continued the lesson.

It was lunchtime again and the twins were hanging around the roof area. Mabel had brought her sterio and decided to bust on some tunes. Dipper on the other hand was trying hard to find the secrets in the journal they found on the first day.

"Le etolies? La Luna? La sole? Il Matto? what's with all this? Luna is moon in latin..." Dipper mused.

Clap your hands everybody and everybody just clap your hands!

Mabel, as if captivated by the voice, began clapping her hands to the beat. Dipper sighed.

"Mabel, you know he doesn't mean that."

"Be quiet dipper, you love this!" Mabel scolded, Dipper sighed and placed his journal

3

2

1

 **Hey hey daddy, gimmie some cola!**

 _Hey hey mummy! Hey hey mummy_

 _ **Oh I can't forget the taste**_

 _ **of that apple pie I ate with haste!**_

 _Draw the circle that's the earth_

 **Draw the circle that's the earth**

 _ **Draw that circle there's the earth**_

 _ **The name's America!**_

 _ **Ah! What a wonderful world**_

 _ **That's drawn by a single brushstroke!**_

 _ **I liiiiiiiiike my stuff to be super sized!**_

 _ **AMEEEEEEERICAAAAAAAAAAA!**_

Dipper and Mabel ended up rolling on the floor laughing. Sure they couldn't speak Japanese but they ended up making up their own lyrics for anime ending.

"It's still racist though." Dipper pointed out, Mabel pouted but picked up the journals.

"Still what's with all this latin."

"It's italian." A dangerous voice came from above, towering over them was a guy around Shu's age with jet black hair and piercings.

"Um...hi?" They replied, with that Dipper grabbed the journal and shoved it in his jacket. Mabel pulled her brother up and carefully stood next to him

Something about this guy isn't right.

"Hmph, and this is the thanks I get? What a couple of ungrateful children." He sighed, the senior held his own book out and read it casually.

Dipper gulped, he knew people like this. Gideon, Pacifica, Reiji. Bill

His calm exterior showed that he could and would crush him and his sister like worms.

Mabel looked anxiously at her brother before she grabbed his hand and took off running to the door. They cried out as they saw another figure blocking the exit. This time it was a giant with orange hair.

"Where do you think you're going...brats!" Dipper and Mabel made no haste to slip between his large legs and run down the stairs.

"RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN!" They screamed, running down the stairs with their legs flying in the air. They ended up rushing into a 2nd year classroom and slammed the door shut. Taking a couple of deep breaths, they noticed Kanato was alone with Yui

Alone

with

Yui...

Dipper tackled Kanato on the ground whilst Mabel pulled Yui away.

"What did you do to her? What the heck did you do to her!" The pine tree accused, Kanato shot a venomous look at Dipper and made him get up warily.

"How dare you interupt my meal, it's very rude, isn't it Teddy?" Kanato leaned to Teddy's ear and whispered something.

Yui observed the twins, their faces were beat red.

"Dipper, Mabel? What's wrong?"

"Tall guy! La Luna! Journal! Legs!" Dipper stuttered, his voice quivered and words spout out like bullets from a machine gun.

"Oi! Sow! Open the door! Those brats!" Yuma cursed, Yui gulped, knowing that Yuma was probably going to slaughter them by the time he storms into the classroom. She turned her left to the window, seeing Dipper and Mabel jumping from the window.

"AAAAAAAAAH! Don't do that!" She warned, luckily for the twins, Mabel's grappling hook had saved them and they landed safely on the ground and escaped.

"What a relie-"

Yui gasped as she was picked up in the air..by Yuma Mukami.

"Y-yuma-kun? What are you doing?! P-put me down! Kana-"

Kanato was gone...that useless bastard, Yui thought bitterly.

"Tch, thinking you could shut me out with a door, did you?"

"I-it's not like that!" She defended, she grasped a nearby plastic bottle with her right hand and clampsed the neck of it with fear. The plastic bottle was half-full (or half-empty if you're that guy) so it meant it could do half as damage. Yui attempted to not focus in the air but focus on Yuma's eyes. His orange pupils had a tinge of green and venom, one false answer and snap. Yui's neck would be broken like a twig. She swung her wrist in the air, flipping the bottle to land on his head. Yuma winced and held his head, allowing Yui to slip through his arms and duck out of the door. Not checking, Yui decided to bolt down the stairs and ran into a person.

"H-hey, watch where you're running. You could fall down these stairs!" The girl looked up to see Mr Shiota carrying her.

"M-mr Shiot-"

"Oi, Nagisa, I think two of your students are running around the school again. Being chased by Yuma Mukami...I think..." Kayano sighed, the former class E students stuck their heads out of the window to see the pines twins high-tailing it from Yuma.

"You little brats!"

"Pines! Pines! Pines!" They chanted as they ran in a complete and full circle.

"Yuma..that's enough!" A voice snarled, suddenly Ruki placed a hand on his younger brother's head and clutched it tightly.

"O-o-o-o-o-wwww! Let go Ruki!" The taller mukami mewled in pain as Ruki clenched on his cranium tighter.

"Score!" Mabel and Dipper high-fived each other with a sense of victory.

After the little fiasco with Yuma, the twins were running down the hallways, recalling all their memories of Gravity falls to Yui.

"So yeah, there was this creepy computer girl who vowed to kill anyone who loved Soos!" Dipper laughed, he wiped his forehead when recalling that painful memory of . As they walked down, the twins noticed a strange boy with bandages.

"Oh Azusa-kun." Yui smiled warmly, Azusa didn't stare at Yui but focused on the twins.

"Eve...who are they?"He mumbled, pointing to the two twins. Before Yui could start, Kanato appeared next to the blonde.

"Sorry, she doesn't talk to peasants." The yandere smirked, he then dragged Yui away.

"Oh snap!" The twins laughed, they hi-fived each other at the witness of a sick burn. Azusa giggled a bit, which creeped out the twins.

"Um...you okay there buddy?" The male twin asked.

"Ne~~Do you miss any friends?" Azusa whispered, he pulled something from behind.

"Oh yeah, Wendy, Soos, Candy and Gre-"

With that Azusa slashed his knife upwards and created a new scar on Mabel, spaning from the top of her right elbow to the end of her right hand.

"There...her name is...Wendy."

Screaming with pain, Mabel dropped to the ground and Azusa already disappeared with laughter. Her frantic cries already attracted attention.

"Dipper, what the hell happened?" Reiji snarled.

"I-I dunno! Some guy called Azusa came and sliced Mabel! S-someone get her to a doctor or something!" Dipper panicked and started shaking Ayato like a magic 8 ball. Shu, being the eldest (and surprisingly the smartest), leaned in and began to lap up Mabel's blood.

"T-the hell are you doing?! We made a vow to not touch their blood!" Subaru gasped, thinking of Yui's new violent personality.

"Calm down brother, there. Apply some bandage and I don't think this should be any trouble." Shu ordered, Reiji expertly binded the bandage. At that moment, Nagisa came.

"Oh my god! Mabel I heard screaming!" He panicked and quickly touched the wound. The shooting star winced as he touched the sensitive spots.

"Do you think she's going to be ok?" Dipper whispered with concern, Reiji nodded his head. His confidence was reassuring.

"I think I'll be okay...Mr Shiota." Mabel whimpered as the wound stung. Nagisa sighed with relief.

"Good, class begins in a couple of minutes. I expect you and your brother to come in three minutes. That goes for you two, Sakamakis." Nagisa spat, he stroded down the hallway.

Subaru scoffed.

"Tch, that guy. He's so smug! Acts like he knows everything!"

"I think we should be worried, he's close friends with Karma Akabane." Shu mumbled.

"Karma? It sounds like a buddist teaching." Laito joked.

"He's no joke, an official. One that isn't fond with our father." Shu continued. Reiji noddded his head.

"We must be careful. Already two other students from Project-koro are here. They're probably investigating something related to the recent familiar attacks. We'll have a talk with the Mukamis later, probably when we have the exchange with Yui. Probably with Azusa too. Mabel, have you stopped bleeding? If you have, we're going home early."

...

WOHOO!

Laito couldn't help but focus on the twins as they played with each other. Each sibling was squealing in pain as they punched each other. Punch buggy blue, Punch buggy black. Punch buggy wolf thing. Punch buggy weird guy with glasses and eyepatch. Those were code words for punching. Thinking it would be fun, Laito gave it a try.

"Hey subaru."

"Hn?"

"Punch buggy tsundere." With that Laito pitfully punched his younger brother's stomach. The albino grinned with malice.

"Hey Laito?"

"Yes?"

"Punch buggy hentai!" Subaru smashed his fist in Laito's face. Each passenger had their different reactions. Shu's grin widen with humour. Reiji coughed to cover up his laugh. Ayato went into fits of laughter. Kanato pouted and whispered something to teddy. The twins and Yui gaped their mouths with shock.

"That's not how punch buggy works!" Yui blubbered, wiping Laito's bleeding face with a tissue. Subaru didn't feel one bit guilty. Laito on the other hand was livid. He felt inferior as the siblings commenced laughing at his failed attempt at punch buggy. As he attempt to appease his anger with non-child-friendly thoughts, Mabel snatched his fedora.

"Hey look at me, I'm Laito sakamaki and I'm a casonova! I'm also known for being a womanizer and wearing a lame cowboy hat!" Mabel ran around the limo with his hat on his head going 'pew pew' using her finger guns.

Laito, growing fed up, picked Mabel up by the collar and tossed her out of the car when it pulled up to the mansion. Instantly Dipper rushed out of the limo and assisted his sister up. Reiji and Yui also exited the car in order to help the older pines.

"Laito..." Shu's soft voice rung out like warning bell. Laito sighed and dusted his fedora, rubbing a little engraving.

 **YROO! XRKSVI! GIRZMTOV**

 **Flashback**

Laito was on his knees as he rummaged to ground for his hat. It was a rainy day when he rejected his mother's advances. After being locked up for 'interacting' with her, he was shaken up. His perceptions of love blew up in his face like a balloon. When he was released by his mother, the hag flung his fedora out of the window. Now he was stuck in mud, litterally, as he was dedicatedly looking for his gift from Bill.

"Damnit..where is it?!" He cursed, suddenly, the rain stopped pelting on him.

"It's a bit rainy, kid? What brings you around here?"

Laito looked up and saw a middle-aged man with glassses and 6 fingers, one hand holding an umbrella over him.

"M-my hat was out here! I'm looking for it." He stumbled. The man nodded his head before standing by the boy. Laito shot him a funny look.

"Sir, you don't have to stay out with me."

"It's fine, continue searching." The man gestured his 6 fingered hand to usher Laito to continue rummaging through the mud. Eventually Laito found his head and rubbed it against his shirt, he placed it on his head.

"Thanks uh...Mr..."

"Call my Ford. You're one of Karl's kids right?"

Laito nodded his head carefully, Ford smacked his lips.

"Oh you're that one. The boy in the dungeon, Light was it?"

"Laito, sir."

Ford sighed again before giving Laito a piece of candy.

"I'm guessing you know why I was in that prison." The vampire sighed, he hung head in shame. Laito patiently waited for Ford to slap him or shun him. The six-fingered man sighed, he placed a hand on the boy's shoulder.

"Your mum screwed you up, it's not your fault. Don't go down the wrong path and don't ruin other people's futures." Ford sighed. Laito cocked his head in confusion.

"You said it like someone screwed up your future."

"He did but I still would like to see him again."

 **YROO! XRKSVI! GIRZMTOV**

Laito was now playing on the piano as he attempted to foster himself to forget what he did to Mabel. Little May-chan, Ford's grandniece.

OINK!

Laito swished his head to the door way and saw Mabel's pig.

"Bacon?" He forget the pig's name. The swine made a strange noise but made it sound like the words 'waddles'.

"Waddles, apologies." He tilted his hat like a gentleman. Waddles, being an actual pig, oinked in confusion but rubbed its head affectionatly against Laito's leg.

"Waddles? Oh c'mon! Where are yo-"

Dipper stopped in fright, seeing Laito's face illumiated by the moonlight.

"Well hello, Dipper, what brings you here on this lovely evening?~" Laito placed emphasis on the word evening with a grin. Dipper gagged and called for Waddles. The pig defiantly snorted and jumped on Laito's lap.

"See?~ Your pig likes me better than yo-"

Waddles snatched Laito's hat and ran down the hallway. Dipper gasped and saw Laito's face of doom.

"Waddles! Don't you dare eat that hat!" Both boys screamed, Laito teleported after the pig and picked it up.

In the moment, Mabel was in the room with Reiji and Yui.

"And then I named him Toot-Toot McBumbersna.-"

Everyone stopped listening to Mabel's tale to see Laito nervously looking at them.

"Stay away from Mabel." Yui picked up a couple of cards, the pervert backed away in fear but Reiji raised his hand up.

"Laito, what brings you here?"

Waddles oinked and placed Laito's hat next to Reiji's leg.

"So...what was the story?" Laito sat at the edge of Mabel's bed. Dipper pulled out a minigolf club and placed it dangerously close to the vampire's head.

"That doesn't concern you La-"

"It was the time when we regained a man's memories, I can start from the top?"

Dipper glared at Mabel and shook his head, silently telling her not to tell that guy secrets, his sister ignored him and began the tale.

01234567891011121314151617181920211202918171615141312111019876543210

Nagisa rang his friend.

"Karma, I swear to god, I'll kill you."

Sugino and Kayano looked awkwardly as they were cramped into Nagisa's mediocre house.

"Oh, Nagisa hey! Yeah I sent Sugino in case you couldn't handle it."

"BUT I COULD HANDLE IT, seriously? why do you want me to spy on these kids? They're rich toffs, why would they concern you?"

"Well then, I heard Tougo Sakamaki on the one with someone from 'Gravity falls' talking about a PLAN about tarot cards, making a new race and eliminating all humans, seems a bit sus doesn't it?"

Both Karma and Nagisa were getting pissed off at the minute.

"I bet you're just jealous!"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Karma slammed the phone and so did Nagisa. Sugino and Kayano looked nervously at each other.

Justice and death do not go hand in hand.

 _ooooooooooooooooooh mysterious! Death and justice! Nagisa, Kayano, Sugino, Kanzaki, Karma and Okuda. If you recall, one of my old (probably discontinued) fanfics starred the 6 of them as my main. Okuda is bae! Also, what's with the stars, lovers, moon and tower? Who knows?_

 _Fav and review!_

 _Aqua out_


End file.
